Dick Quote #1583
Quote from Dick in A Dick Replacement
Dick: Look, there's no need to delay the inevitable, Gary, my son, my brother, my protege... me.
Gary Hemmings: You mean, I've got the job? When do I start, sir?
Dick: Well, Mary's last class starts at 3:00, so if you can coax her to a happy hour at 5:00, you should be in the sack by 7:00.
Gary Hemmings: What? Wait a minute. I'm not sleeping with Dr. Albright just to get the job.
Dick: What do you mean? Sleeping with Mary is the job! Well, part of it anyway. She likes to shop, too.
Gary Hemmings: I just wanna teach physics. That's all I've ever wanted.
Dick: We had a deal!
Mary: [enters] Hey, guys. Chicken Jerusalem in the cafeteria.
Gary Hemmings: Dr. Albright, you may be a handsome woman and I would certainly love a position here at the university, but I am not going to sleep with you! Good-bye!
Mary: Okay, that's fair. Dick... guess what I wanna know.
Dick: [groans] They call it "Chicken Jerusalem" because they make it with Jerusalem artichokes.
3rd Rock from the Sun Quotes
‘A Dick Replacement’ Quotes
Quote from Mary
Mary: Listen, you. That psychic didn't know anything. You have many, many years ahead of you, and I will be right by your side. And after that, I don't want anybody else.
Dick: Mary, you'd rather be alone?
Mary: After you, I'm done.
Dick: Of course you are. How could I expect you to ever settle for anyone else after being with someone like me? I've ruined you.
Mary: More than you'll ever know.
Quote from Dick
Dick: After so long on this planet, I've finally learned my most important lesson of all.
Sally: What's that?
Dick: That it's better to have loved Dick and lost Dick than never to have had Dick at all.
Sally: Still, I'll pass.
Quote from Dick
Mary: Oh, look, Dick, a fortune teller. Oh, let's go in. It'll be fun.
Dick: Fortune teller. If this so-called fortune teller can see the future, wouldn't she have been able to predict the decline of this neighborhood?
Mary: Okay, so you don't believe in psychics, but you do believe in the Loch Ness Monster.
Dick: I do no believe in the Loch Ness Monster. I believe Nessie is a friendly sea serpent whose frisky demeanor has been misinterpreted as monster-like.