Dick: You know, I'm suddenly feeling very creative.
Mary: Really?
Dick: Mm-hmm. [kisses Mary]
Mary: [lips clenched] Did you kiss that dead chipmunk?
Dick: Oh, not on the lips.

Dick: Oh nice letter, Tommy.
Tommy: I didn't write it.
Dick: Well, then who did?
Harry: A scout never expects praise for a good deed.
Dick: Gosh, it's exactly your story, it's uncanny.
Tommy: I know.
Harry: A good deed is its own reward.
Sally: Come on, boys, who wants meat?
Dick & Tommy: I do, I do! I do, I do!
Harry: Hey, good scout here. I mean that I wrote the letter. It was me! It was me!

Sally: Mmm, meat!
Dick: Yep! It's red, dead and corn-fed.

Dick: Come on, come on, yes. You'll be safe in here with me all day.
Mary: Dick, where did you get that dog?
Dick: Oh, some old guy with dark glasses was pushing her down the sidewalk.
Mary: Okay, that's it, you are officially out of control. [car crashes outside]