Andy Quote #357

Quote from Andy in The Incentive

Andy: What's up, guys? Just thought we'd have a little rap session, talk about business, see how things are going? [clears throat]
Jim: Why don't you start?
Andy: If no one else wants to? I was just thinking about Robert. Man, what a boss. Just throws down goals, you know? Anyway, how's the sales doubling project going?
Phyllis: Yeah, how are we supposed to do that? We can't just press a magic button.
Andy: Of course not. There's no magic button. You have to summon that.
Stanley: If we could just double our sales, we already would have. You're not making any sense.
Jim: He brings up two good points. Do you have any new leads? Any new territories you want us to look into? Maybe have an in with a big client that we can get our foot in the door?
Andy: [silence]

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 ‘The Incentive’ Quotes

Quote from Kevin

Jim: Hey, so this isn't matching up with this and I'm not sure which one's right. Can you just hunt down the original for me?
Kevin: Yes. Me do.
Jim: Alright.
[later:]
Jim: Hey, Kev, what were you saying before about the paperwork?
Kevin: Me do it now. Go. Stop worry.
Pam: Kevin, do you feel okay?
Kevin: Me feel good. Body strong. Sleep big last night.
Pam: Yeah, I think we should get him to the hospital.
Jim: Yeah, alright. Kev, why don't you come with us?
Oscar: No, guys.
Angela: No, he's fine.
Oscar: He's fine.
Angela: He's always been like that.
Pam: No, he hasn't.
Angela: I mean, he's gotten worse over the years....
Oscar: He's making a statement. It's an ironic comment on our expectations of him. A fun-house image of our model of Kevin.
Kevin: You keep think that.
[aside to camera:]
Kevin: Me mechanic not speak English. But he know what me mean when me say "car no go", and we best friends. So me think: why waste time, say lot word when few word do trick?

Quote from Kevin

Jim: Does it save time though? ‘Cause we've been here for about an hour.
Kevin: No me fault.
Pam: Kevin, at most you're saving a microscopic amount of time.
Kevin: Many small time make big time.
Andy: What are you gonna do with all this time?
Kevin: See world.
Pam: Kevin, you cannot possibly save enough time to see the world.
Jim: Kevin, are you saying "See the world"? or "Sea World?"
Kevin: See world. Oceans. Fish. Jump. China.
Jim: No, see? Right there, that's the problem with your method. ‘Cause I still don't know if you're saying "Sea World" or "see the world," and it's taking a lot of time to explain it.
Kevin: Fine, fine. I'll talk normally.
[aside to camera:]
Kevin: When me President, they see. They see.

Quote from Robert

Robert: Why did I choose Andy to run the office? Because he's all surface, uncomplicated. What you see is what you get. Could be a recipe for mediocrity, yes, but then again, it might just be why people fight for him. There's something about an underdog that really inspires... the unexceptional.