Toby: Okay, look, in a real crisis situation, you're not gonna have to time to think, okay? So just remember, I-A-A-T-G. "It's all about the groin."
Andy: What if you're being attacked by a... smallish man who happens to not have a groin?
Toby: I don't think that's very common.
Andy: What if you're being attacked by a 4'11" man who is penis-less?
Oscar: Why are you fixated on this hypothetical trans-gendered attacker?
Andy: Why don't we start with the basics? Show us how to defend ourselves against a baby, and then like, a fifth grade girl, and then, you know, if we have time, on up to a scary man.
Toby: Well, the most common scenario is a larger man attacking a smaller female.
Andy: So in that scenario, what if the victim sucker-punches the attacker in the face? What can the attacker then do to better protect himself?
Toby: It's interesting that you're drawn to the point of view of the attacker. You would like "The Turn of the Table". Okay, the latest Chad Flenderman novel... [everyone groans] written from the point of view of his nemesis, Dr. Lucifer Wu.