Brick Quote #499
Quote from Brick in War of the Hecks
Brick: I need to read you something.
Axl: Oh, God, not the old-lady book again.
Brick: No, this is from a young lady who's in a lot of pain. "My dearest brother. I know you're going back to college tomorrow. But before you go, I want you to know that I am so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, very, very, ver--" Basically, she's sorry.
Axl: Yeah.
Brick: "In exchange for your forgiveness, I will allow you 10 Indian burns, 3 pink bellies, 2 Dutch ovens, and a chili dunk." She does stipulate that all this be done on a weekend so she has time to recover.
Axl: Mm.
Brick: Look, Axl, I really don't think you'll get better than this. My advice would be to accept the offer.
Axl: [chuckles] No.
The Middle Quotes
‘War of the Hecks’ Quotes
Quote from Brick
Axl: Hey, buddy! How would you like to play this new game I invented? I call it "Extreme Room Makeover, Brick Edition." Ahh!
Brick: If it's anything like your other games, "Hamper Hostage", "Drier Ride", and "Toilet Explorer", I think I'll pass. Besides, I've got a new book I'm very excited about and wish not to be disturbed.
Axl: Unsinkable by Debbie Reynolds?
Brick: It's on the branch librarian's list of winter must-reads. She was dead-on about Nora Ephron's I Feel Bad About My Neck, and this is supposed to be just as good.
Axl: Mm, okay. Here's the thing, Brick. [clears throat] It's not exactly a choice. Now, you can help me, or your book can be the next contestant on Toilet Explorer, and I'm guessing it's really not that unsinkable.
Quote from Brick
Brick: Sorry, Margie. Just not my cup of tea. I don't think I'm the target audience. Really looking forward to Secrets Of The Ya-Ya Sisterhood, though. [whispers] Ya-Ya.
Quote from Axl
[Brick holds up a CD of Mariah Carey's "Merry Christmas" album]
Axl: Keep.
Brick: Keep?
Axl: Whatever. Just keep. I don't care. Just keep it.