Axl: That crack about Spudsy's... too far.
Hutch: Dude, you do work at a potato place. You made fun of it yourself.
Axl: Not in front of people. That was below the belt.
Hutch: Look, no biggie. I'll just go back out there and pump you back up about the Olympic-diver thing, and I'll say you're on the short list for Dancing with the Stars.
Axl: You know what? Don't.
Hutch: Why not?
Axl: [sighs] 'Cause it's B.S. Excuse me. Everyone, I have something to say. Um... this is gonna be hard to believe... [chuckles] but although I do clearly have the sinewy grace of an Olympic diver [inhales deeply] I'm not. Been lying to you. The truth is, although I do have a college degree, I now work part-time at a potato store for minimum wage. You know, I still live at home with my parents. I share a room with my little brother. And I put my mom's underwear away, 'cause that's just the way it works in our house. You can't just do the wash. You got to put it away, too. And if you're gonna load the dishwasher, you got to do it right. Who knew that plastic bowls go on the top rack? Am I right? [all hands go up] Oh, my God. Everybody. Really? Wow, okay. Look... point is, that's who I really am. And I had to tell you, 'cause if I'm not honest with you, I can't be honest with myself.
Hutch: [sighs] I'm proud of you, man. That took a lot of guts. I'll tell Beyoncé about it... Might be a song in it.