Michael Quote #251
Quote from Michael in Janet(s)
Michael: Janet's void has a back door to the Janet warehouse in the Neutral Zone, which is right near Accounting. You four will stay here while Actual Janet and I sneak through it and find the Head Accountant.
Tahani-Jacket: But, Michael, why can't we go with you?
Janet: Well, you just died, which means you're the first humans in history to not immediately go to the Good or Bad Place, which, in turn, makes you inter-dimensional fugitives. So that's neat.
Michael: Also, the Judge is probably still pissed at me for, you know, breaking all the rules, and she might take it out on you. Plus, the Bad Place is probably hunting for us, so, literally, the entire universe is against you.
Eleanor-Janet: Okay, but what's a fourth really good reason? Jeez, just trying to lighten the mood... tough void.
Michael: Now, Janet and I will pose as Good Place employees and sweet-talk the Accountant into showing us his books. If I'm right, we will find proof that the Bad Place is tampering with the point system. The Accountant will tell us what to do, and this will all be over. We're almost at the end, guys. Just stay here and keep Janet's heads on straight.
The Good Place Quotes
‘Janet(s)’ Quotes
Quote from Michael
Neil: Well, I've got to run. We're having a little thing in the break room for Marisol's birthday. She turning 39,000,000 again. So, if there's nothing else...
Michael: "If there's nothing else"? Neil, be logical. Not one Good Place resident in over 500 years? Not Jonas Salk? Not Harriet Tubman? Not one single Golden Girl? The Bad Place has hacked your system!
Neil: No, it hasn't. How dare you? Frankly, I'm beginning to resent your tone, sir. If you've got a problem, then go to the Good Place and take it up with the Committee. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get to the break room, because there's cake over there, and if I don't move quickly, Erika will get the last corner piece. Good day, sir!
Quote from Eleanor
Jason: That was awesome! I want to go again!
Eleanor: Where are we?
Michael: We're in the Good Place.
Eleanor: No offense, dude, but you have told us a lot of lies in the last 300 years. So, seriously, where the fork are we? Fork. Shirt. Ash hole. [gasps] Holy forking shirtballs. We're in the Good Place!
Quote from Jason
Chidi-Janet: This is nuts. We're in a void in the body of a white lady.
Eleanor-Janet: Not a lady.
Tahani-Janet: Not a lady, darling.
Jason-Janet: Well, we are white. Let's all say white people things! Billy Joel. I found it on Etsy. There was nowhere to park. Did you refill the Brita?