Rose: We had a neighbor in Minnesota who killed her husband. She backed over him with a combine and she didn't even know she had done it until she found little bits of plaid in the corn. She said, "Funny, that looks like bits of Joe's plaid shirt, and that looks like bits of Joe's overalls, and that looks like bits of Joe's arms and that looks like bits of..."
Blanche: Rose! We get the picture!
Rose: They had a very little coffin-
Blanche: Ah!
Dorothy: Listen, Rose. You are not to blame. Now, you know that.
Rose: Of course I know that. She was driving the combine. I wasn't anywhere near their farm.

Rose: Oh, poor Al, and he just got a hair transplant.
Blanche: Here's a Beatty in Boca Raton. It's the only one.
Rose: And somebody told me he just bought a farm. Oh, my God. What'll I say to her?
Sophia: That he died in the bed of an idiot.

Rose: Well, I've never had to do this before, tell a wife that her husband's been cheating on her with me. That's the hardest thing to tell anybody.
Blanche: Oh, no, it's not. How about having to tell a pregnant woman that her husband's been cheating on her with her own sister and you're the sister and you're pregnant, too by her husband.
Dorothy: You didn't!
Blanche: Not me! Last night on Dallas. Or Dynasty. Or Falcon's Landing. Or one of those. They're all the same.
Rose: Oh, I thought you were the one.
Blanche: Oh, please. I could never do anything like that. If you saw my brother-in-law, you'd know why.