Barry Quote #1575
Quote from Barry in Million Dollar Reward
Barry: But I'll spend the next two weeks making the necessary changes so as not to wind up a bum, like Matt Bradley, or worse, a chiropractor.
Matt: That seems fair.
Barry: First order of business... I hereby disband the JTP.
Andy: Because you're slightly struggling in med school, we can't hang out?
Barry: Not even without me. The thought of you cavorting in my absence is way too distracting. When this meeting is adjourned, you'll each be assigned different directions to walk in.
Joanne: And none of them are the directions you came from.
Andy: But we live together.
Barry: Then you will fill your apartment with Japanese dividers to only see each other's silhouettes as you rush to and from the fridge.
Joanne: Creative and virtually impossible. You're off to a great start here, babe.
The Goldbergs Quotes
‘Million Dollar Reward’ Quotes
Quote from Adam
Adult Adam: [v.o.] I just had to sneak back home before my mom knew what happened. How hard could that be? Turns out, pretty hard.
Officer Puchinski: Excuse me, sir. Sir, you need to come with me.
Adam: Is there a law against taking a morning stroll in the same pants, shirt, and unmentionables you wore the night before?
Officer Puchinski: I'm not here to arrest you. I'm here for the reward.
Adam: Reward?
[Officer Puchinski holds up a poster featuring an image of Adam and Beverly along with the text "Missing Child!! Call Beverly Immediately At (215) 555-0174. My baby angel was stolen from my breast! $1,000,000 reward! Officer Puchinski points Adam to trees and signposts covered with the posters]
Adam: Oh, my God.
Officer Puchinski: You're the "baby angel" who was "stolen from her breast," right?
Adam: You know I am. Let's just ride.
Quote from Mr. Glascott
Adult Adam: [v.o.] I knew my mom was worried that I was out all night, but maybe we could discuss it like reasonable people.
Beverly: Where in the [bleep] were you?
Mr. Glascott: Ooh, coming in hot but deserved.
Adam: Why is my high school guidance counselor here?
Mr. Glascott: When will you acknowledge that I have transitioned from scholastic acquaintance to top-tier family friend?
Beverly: I aged years last night worrying about you, though you would never know it because of my fabulous skin.
Mr. Glascott: It's like a fine Dutch porcelain.
Beverly: Thank you.
Mr. Glascott: Would "just a guidance counselor" say something that personal? I don't think so.
Quote from Barry
Barry: And I'll require silence in this house. It is way too loud and chaotic!
Erica: That's 100% because of you.
Joanne: Bar, maybe we should spend the next two weeks at my parents' house.
Barry: Yeah, their bland personalities and drab home will be way less distracting. And Lou is sort of a doctor, so he'll understand my delicate needs.
Geoff: Our dad's an actual doctor.
Barry: He's an eye doctor. That's the chiropractor of the face. Meeting adjourned.