Mr. Glascott Quote #93
Quote from Mr. Glascott in An Itch Like No Other
Beverly: So... [chuckles] How are things?
Mr. Glascott: Well, things are fine... Oh, how dare you? Trying to lure me in with a classic conversation starter.
Beverly: About the barbecue...
Mr. Glascott: Stop. If you're feeling guilty, don't. I don't need your friendship. [chuckles] I'm aces, baby!
Feather Locklear: [squawks] I'm so lonely. [squawks] I'm so lonely.
Mr. Glascott: But my bird, on the other hand... Relax, girl. You'll find someone.
Beverly: It's clear the bird is just repeating something you said.
Mr. Glascott: Parrots don't do that.
Beverly: Of course they do. It's called "parroting."
Feather Locklear: [squawks] I'm so lonely.
Mr. Glascott: Nap time. [pulls cover over birdcage] [sighs] She just loves to [bleep] with me.
The Goldbergs Quotes
‘An Itch Like No Other’ Quotes
Quote from Mr. Glascott
Mr. Glascott: Howdy, neighbor.
Beverly: What time is it?
Mr. Glascott: It is 6:31 in the glorious morning. One minute after neighborhoods across the globe officially open for biz.
Beverly: It's barely light outside.
Mr. Glascott: You know, I used to live overlooking a limestone quarry. That giant, watery pit held so many mysteries. And, for some reason, a Safeway shopping cart.
Beverly: The street lights are still on.
Mr. Glascott: I made strudel. Be careful cutting it. My first rent check is baked inside.
Beverly: That's fun, I guess.
Mr. Glascott: Oh, it was an accident. You know what? Let's plate it before the caramel smudges the ink.
Quote from Barry
Erica: Do you really have to lay there like that, with your butt hovering in the air?
Barry: Well, ever since you overinflated my medical pillow, my options for comfort are limited.
Erica: [sighs] I never thought I would miss looking at your face.
Barry: And there's a new issue. The pain is now an itch. [groans] An itch like no other.
Erica: You heard the doctor. Scratching will prolong the healing, and nobody wants that.
Barry: Just give me a slotted spoon? A balloon whisk? A seafood fork? A grapefruit spoon? A melon baller? One of those little things you hold corn with? Anything!
Erica: Ew! You're a little too familiar with the scratching power of our silverware.
Quote from Beverly
Murray: With a grill like this, I can't have my lady cooking just for me. She'll cook for the whole block.
Beverly: It's the life I've always dreamed of! [grunts] We'll host every weekend and invite all our friends, but we'll always exclude one couple, hmm? Everyone will be in a permanent state of social anxiety. Yay!