Philip Quote #138
Will: Hey, Uncle Phil. I think Aunt Viv put the Ring Dings in the cabinet over here.
Philip: The sink is busted, and I'm trying to fix it, Will.
Will: Wait, wait, Uncle Phil, no. Geoffrey's eyebrows just grew back from the time you tried to fix the stove, man.
Vivian: Philip, drop the wrench and step away from the sink.
Philip: Why does everybody act like I'm dangerous when I'm trying to fix something?
Vivian: Have you forgotten the toaster incident, sweetie? Geoffrey hasn't.
Philip: How was I supposed to know a piece of whole wheat would scratch a man's cornea?
More The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Quotes
Quote from Geoffrey
Vivian: Geoffrey, can I get some coffee, please?
Geoffrey: l'm working on it, madam.
Vivian: Well, when will it be ready?
Geoffrey: At this rate? About the time Queen Elizabeth opens for Queen Latifah.
Quote from Jazz
Vivian: So, who's gonna be your partner?
Will: Oh, Kellogg Leiberbaum. He's the smartest dude in school. He's gonna call me on the car phone at 8:00. That is, if Uncle Phil don't try to fix it.
Philip: Well, that's it. The next person that mentions the phone gets a boot in their behind.
Jazz: Mr. Banks, your phone is broken.
[Uncle Phil throws Jazz out of the house. Later, Jazz dusts himself off as he returns to the living room]
Jazz: It occurs to me, this family's got a lot to learn about hospitality.
Quote from Will
Tyriq: Carlton is your partner?
Jazz: Yeah, what he got I ain't got?
Will: On a straight up tip, y'all, see, Carlton got this rare disease, right? And to go on this game show was his last desperate wish before he takes that old dirt nap.
Tyriq: That's decent, Will.
Jazz: What he got?
Will: Um... Uh... He got Bette Davis eyes.
Quote from Mistaken Identity
Sergeant: Sit down!
Philip: Hey! You don't talk to my wife like that.
Sergeant: Now, wait a minute, buddy. Who the hell do you think you're talking-
Philip: Who the hell do you think you're talking to?
Henry: What's going on?
Sergeant: May I help you, sir?
Henry: I'm Henry Furth.
Sergeant: Good news. Your car is safe and sound. And we've got the perpetrators.
Henry: Those aren't the perpetrators. Those are my partner's son and nephew.
Philip: Legal partner. I've got a few questions for you. When you got this alleged confession from them did they have a lawyer present? No. Because I'm their lawyer. Did you notify their parents? No. Because we're their parents. So, Officer, don't tell us to wait. And don't tell us to sit down. Just open that damn cell and let those two boys out or I'll tie this place up with so much litigation that your grandchildren are gonna need lawyers!
Quote from The Fresh Prince Project
Will: Look, man, I don't have the problem, alright? You have the problem. I remind you of where you came from and what you used to be. Now, I don't know, somewhere between Princeton or the office, you got soft. You forgot who you are and where you came from.
Philip: You think you're so wise. [Will turns away] Look at me when I'm talking to you. Let me tell you something, son. I grew up on the streets just like you. I encountered bigotry you could not imagine. Now, you have a nice poster of Malcolm X on your wall. I heard the brother speak. I read every word he wrote. Believe me, I know where I come from.
Will: You actually heard Malcolm speak, man?
Philip: That's right. So before you criticize somebody, you find out what he's all about.
Quote from Those Were the Days
Marge: Looks like I've had quite an impact on your kids.
Philip: You're proud of getting a high school kid suspended?
Marge: If you mean, am I proud to have told him to do anything you have to for what you believe in then, yes, I am.
Vivian: Marge, when you talked to Will about when we chained ourselves together at sit-ins, you're only giving him the romantic part of the struggle. Girlfriend, you are leaving out everything that went before it. The leaflets, the petitions, the years of trying to work through the system.
Marge: If the system doesn't work, you have to blow the door down. Looks like you forgot that.
Philip: You talk as if I wasn't there with you in Birmingham facing dogs and fire hoses. This is me, Olifami. The same Olifami that was with you the night Harlem went up in flames. But now I have a family and I choose not to fight in the streets. I have an office to fight from and I have fought and won cases for fair housing, affirmative action, health care, and I am not ashamed to write a big fat check for something I believe in and that doesn't make me any less committed than you. So don't you dare look down your damn nose at me, Adibola.