Eric: Bad news, Dad. The Pinciottis have these.
Red: Red, white and blue napkins? That clever S.O.B. And I cheaped out and went for the plain white.
Eric: So what, now we surrender?
Red: Surrender? You know, if this were an actual war, you'd be the first in a body bag.
Eric: Yes, sir. I'm gonna go refill the ketchups.
Red: [soda can explodes over Red] Schlitz.