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The Note

‘The Note’

Season 3, Episode 1 -  Aired September 18, 1991

Jerry, George and Elaine get a doctor's note from a dentist to visit a physiotherapist. Meanwhile, Kramer is convinced he saw Joe DiMaggio at a donut shop.

Quote from George

Jerry: What happened to you?
George: One of those kids called me a Mary.
Elaine: A what?
George: I was jumping over a puddle and for some reason I went like this. [George stretches his arms out in a ballet motion] They called me a Mary. So I chased them, and I tripped and I fell.
Kramer: Yeah, you know kids, they can be very perceptive.
Elaine: Hey, George? What is this? [Elaine mimics George's motion] What is that? No really, what is that?


Quote from Elaine

Jerry: He's got a house, a family, they could take away his license. You should have heard him. Three notes, how stupid was that? We never should have got three notes.
Elaine: Three notes?
Jerry: Yeah, you, me and George.
Elaine: You got me a note?
Jerry: Yeah.
Elaine: But I got my own note.
Jerry: You what?
Elaine: I got a note from my gynecologist.
Jerry: Why'd you do that?
Elaine: I didn't know you were getting me a note.
Jerry: Of course I was getting you a note.
Elaine: But you didn't say anything.
Jerry: Neither did you. That's how he got caught. We sent in four notes from two doctors.
Kramer: How can you do that to your friend? He's got a wife, kids, and a lot of other stuff. Oh, yeah. [exits]

Quote from Jerry

Jerry: I don't even know what to say.
George: Me neither.
Jerry: I knew this would happen.
George: Me too.
Jerry: I mean the whole thing, it's just...
George: Tragic.
Jerry: Well, it's not tragic.
George: No?
Jerry: No, it's...
George: Unsettling?
Jerry: Okay.

Quote from Jerry

Pam: [enters] I hope you're both happy. [exits]
Jerry: I'm not happy.
George: Me neither. I've never been happy.
Jerry: I mean I'm happy sometimes, but not now.
George: In college, maybe. Those were fun times.
Jerry: Yeah, college was fun.
Pam: [returns] You know the whole practice is in jeopardy, you know that?
Roy: Don't mind her.
Jerry: Oh please, I love her.
George: I've just met her but I'm very impressed.

Quote from George

Roy: I can't understand, I've never had a problem with these notes before.
Jerry: What's the next move, what's gonna happen now?
Roy: Well, nothing really, as long as we get the physical therapist to go along with our story.
Jerry: What? The physical therapist? Why?
Roy: She just has to say the complaint was related to a dental problem.
[The patient in the chair wakes up and looks at Jerry and George]
George: How you doing?

Quote from Jerry

Jerry: Hi. Look, I know I don't have an appointment but it's really important that I talk with Julianna.
Receptionist: I'm sorry, Mr. Seinfeld, she's not in.
Jerry: Yeah, I know she's mad at me but I really have to speak with her.
Receptionist: I told you, she's not here.
Jerry: You don't understand.
Receptionist: Look, you have to leave.
Jerry: Wait a second, don't you- [Julianna walks by with her child] Hi. Hi. Look, I don't know what you--
Julianna: Please!
Jerry: But, you see- Let me just talk to you for a second, see, what I did is inadvertently sent an insurance--
Julianna: I treated you, so please, just get out of the office!
Jerry: Can't you just listen to me?
Julianna: Run Billy! Run to the office and close the door! [to the receptionist] Call the police!

Quote from George

Jerry: Oh, my God, it's...
George: Joe DiMaggio.
Kramer: Where?
Jerry: Having a cup of coffee.
Elaine: He's dunking!
Jerry: Wow. Look at him. The Yankee Clipper. Here.
George: You see? Now, that is a handsome man. [off Elaine and Jerry's look] Oh, please.
Kramer: Wait, wait. [bangs table] Yip! Yip! See? I told you.

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