Elliot: Doug, I'm sorry, but I don't think you're cut out for being a doctor.
Pathologist: I cannot figure out how this guy died.
Doug: I'm betting he took a paracentesis needle to the aorta.
Pathologist: Have you seen this before?
Doug: Seen it? Upstairs they call that a "Doug"!
Elliot: You got any others you can't figure out?
[montage:]
Doug: Doctor prescribed overdosage of Fentanyl.
Doug: Dissected left main during a cardiac catheterization.
Doug: We look under Mr. Pancreas and there it is. [pulls out a bloody glove]
Pathologist: He's the best I've ever seen. Mind if we steal him from you?
Elliot: I can live with it.
Doug: Well, my work here is done. [removes gloves and throws them in the corpse's cavity]
Elliot: I'll get those.

Dr. Kelso: Miss Broderick.
Neena: Bob. Oh, hi, Ted, how's your wife doing? [Ted is silent] Oh, that's right, I forgot you freeze up around me. Okay. Well, I'll see you in court on the eighteenth. [walks away]
J.D.: [v.o.] Ted's possum-like defense mechanism was actually quite brilliant.
Ted: Hello, Neena. We got divorced, actually. I'll see you in court on the eighteenth!

Elliot: Carla, when I became chief resident, I wrote a pledge to myself. And do you know what it said? It said "Dance like nobody is watching". Which I do, constantly, in my living room, with the shades closed just in case somebody is watching. But it also said not to hide problems away. So, no, I'm not gonna go and hide Doug down in the morgue.