Turk Quote #218

Quote from Turk in His Story II

Dr. Miller: Dr. Turk, this is Bryan. You'll be assisting me on his tumor debulking this afternoon.
Turk: Whassup, Bry-Bry! You, my friend, have just won the lottery. I'm not saying I'm good, but if there was a surgeon awards show around here, it'd be called The Turkies. You know what I'm sayin'?
Dr. Cox: You don't have to know what he's sayin'. None of us do.


‘His Story II’ Quotes

Quote from Turk

J.D.: [v.o.] Come on, don't get mad at Turk. What's really bugging me is that, thanks to Dr. Cox, I've got nothing to do. Nothing to talk about. No stories to tell. [slaps Turk's head]
Turk: [v.o.] From the moment I woke up this morning, I have been freaking out about getting married. Luckily, Carla's being cool.
Carla: Okay, this is your last chance to uninvite that slut you went out with in high school.
Turk: She's married to my brother.
Carla: Isn't that convenient.
Turk: [v.o.] Thank God she thinks that hot chick, Tina, I invited is my cousin! Well guess what! There's no blood there, baby!
Carla: Oh, and by the way, don't think for a second that your "cousin" Tina's gonna be sitting at our table.
Turk: [v.o.] Oh, my God! She's in my head. It's okay. Use it to your advantage. Make me a grilled cheese sandwich, woman!
Carla: Make it yourself.
Turk: [v.o.] [screams]

Quote from J.D.

J.D.: [v.o.] Today's gonna be a great day. Still, no time to dilly-dally. God, that's a fun phrase. I have to meet Dr.
Cox in five... Good God, check out those dilly-dallies. That may be the future Mrs... Ugh. Okay, back to work. Because Dr. Cox has hand-selected me to help him on a research project.
J.D.: Hey, research buddy.
Dr. Cox: We're four seconds in and I'm already regretting my decision.
J.D.: [ding] Things Jordan says during sex! Ha!

Quote from J.D.

Dr. Cox: Are those the charts I wanted?
J.D.: No. They're the charts you wanted, plus patient history charts from the last ten years, which yours truly stayed up all night organizing not only chronologically but by severity of condition. [drops the papers] There's a good chance I'm gonna kill someone.
Dr. Cox: [ding] Things you say when you talk to your patients.
J.D.: Clever.

Turk Quotes

Quote from My Advice to You

J.D.: [v.o.] It's always nice when someone from Carla's family comes to town. Mostly because she cleans our apartment.
Carla: Why is there a pancake in the silverware drawer?
Turk: You mean, why is there silverware in the pancake drawer? Wuh-huh!

Quote from My Life in Four Cameras

Carla: Hey, we're missing Sanford and Son.
Turk: What?
Carla: Yes.
J.D.: [v.o.] Turk was freaked out because Carla never joins us on Sanford and Son night or Cheers night. I think it was because she was feeling a little romantically competitive with Kylie and me.
[After Kylie hugs J.D., Carla starts licking Turk's head]
Turk: Woman! Woman, I am not a lollipop! [sings to Sanford and Son theme] Quiet down now, It is time to watch the show, Yes, it started, Don't be lickin' me no mo', Matter of fact, Could you get me a handiwipe?

Quote from My Fault

Turk: What's up with the white people on top?
Carla: Turk, they don't have tiny plastic interracial couples.
Baker: I'll just color it in with some chocolate frosting.
Turk: Oh, that's a great idea. Put 'em in blackface.
Carla: Turk!
Turk: What? While you're at it, why don't you put a string in the back of him, so when you pull it he sings "Mammy"!
Baker: Forget it.
Turk: Where are you going? To the back of the bakery where you keep all the other colored cakes? I'mma call Jesse! And we gonna march on your ass! [licks frosting] Mm.