Dr. Cox Quote #90
Quote from Dr. Cox in My Bed Banter & Beyond
Dr. Cox: And bam! The shine's off the apple. And that's when you find out that that pretty girl you married isn't a pretty girl at all. No. She's a man-eater. And I'm not talking about the "Whoa, whoa, here she comes" kind of man-eater. I'm talking about the kind that uses your dignity as a dishtowel to wipe up any shreds of manhood that might be stuck inside the sink. Of course, I may have tormented her from time to time, but honest to God I that's what I thought marriage was all about. So much so, that by the end of that relationship, I honestly don't know who I hated more: her or me. I used to sit around and wonder why our friends weren't trying to destroy each other like we were. And here it turns out the answer's pretty simple. They weren't unhappy. We were.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Bed Banter & Beyond’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Cox
Dr. Cox: I guess I became a doctor because ever since I was a little boy, I just wanted to help people. I don't tell this story very often, but I remember when I was seven years old, one time, I found a bird that had fallen out of its nest. So, I picked him up and I brought him home, and I made him a house out of an empty shoebox, and... [laughs] Oh, my God! [sighs] I became a doctor for the same four reasons everybody does: Chicks, money, power and chicks. But since HMOs have made it virtually impossible to make any real money, which directly affects the number of chicks who come sniffing around, and don't ask me what tree they're barking up, 'cause they're sure as hell not pissing on mine. And as far as power goes, well... Here I am during my free time letting some 13-year-old psychology fellow who couldn't cut it in real medicine ask me questions about my personal life. So here's the inside scoop there, pumpkin. Why don't you go ahead and tell me all about power?
Quote from Carla
Carla: When I was little, my mom used to have what she called "episodes". Episodes is a flattering term for this thing where she'd sweat a lot and, well, let's just say her stomach talked. Anyway, this one time, we were at the supermarket and she actually passed out. And out of nowhere, this fancy-looking guy comes forward and tells everyone to step aside and give my mother some air. And everyone did. You have to understand, in my family, nobody ever listens to a word anyone else says. Even screaming at the top of our lungs, nothing. So when this man said, "Step aside", and everyone did, I asked my aunt, "Who is this guy?" And she said he was a doctor. And I thought, "Wow. I want to be a doctor too." But when I lost my first tooth and nobody left $180,000 under my pillow, I decided to become a nurse. We do all the real stuff anyway.
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Dr. Kelso: When the Kelsonoviches settled in Monroeville, P.A., there were two steel mills, three bars, and not a doctor in sight. Then my old man set up a shingle and started delivering babies and stitching up three-fingered steel men by the wagonload. Everybody loved him. When they couldn't come up with the cash, he would gladly accept a handmade sweater or a bushel of turnips. [laughs] Jackass.