Turk: I can't lose to J.D., I don't care what it takes.
Dr. Cox: I thought he was your best friend.
Turk: Yeah, well, winning is way more important than friendship. My gram-gram taught me that. His patients love him. How do we undo that?
Todd: After you're done rating me at rateyourdoc.org go to my website: thetoddtime.com. Be sure to check out the Tranny Todd feature. It lets you see what the big dog looks like with the girl parts.
[later:]
Todd: Ma'am, the key to a speedy recovery is less moaning, more boning. Sure as my name is Dr. John Dorian.
Turk: That's what I'm talking about! I said it again. Aw, Damn.