Tom Quote #233
Leslie Knope: Let's say you rub a bottle and a genie comes out and gives you three wishes. What would those wishes be?
Tom: Come on, Leslie.
Leslie Knope: This'll be a fun game. Three wishes. Go.
Tom: Okay, first wish, I have a huge house with a ton of balconies.
Leslie Knope: Yeah, okay.
Tom: And I would just stand out there observing my empire, like a drug dealer in a Michael Bay movie. And I'll just spend my time out there reading my iPad and drinking espressos in a terrycloth robe.
Leslie Knope: Wish number two.
Tom: Okay, I'm the CEO of the Spike TV Network. And my best friend / personal assistant is Oscar winner Jamie Foxx. And we create a raunchy animated series based on our friendship called Tommy and the Foxx.
Leslie Knope: Okay, we don't have to do this anymore.
Tom: No, no, I'm into it now. Wish number three. They remake Point Break. I play both roles. Keanu and Swayze.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Soulmates’ Quotes
Quote from Leslie Knope
Ann: Describe your ideal man.
Leslie Knope: He's dark and mysterious, and he can sing, and he plays the organ.
Ann: I think you just described the Phantom of the Opera.
Leslie Knope: Mm.
Quote from Tom
Leslie Knope: Do you want to go to lunch?
Tom: Uh, no, I don't really feel like going to JJ's.
Leslie Knope: We can go anywhere. Your choice. I'm buying.
Tom: Can I get apps and 'serts?
[aside to camera:]
Tom: 'Serts are what I call desserts. Tray-trays are entrees. I call sandwiches Sammies, Sandoozles, or Adam Sandlers. Air conditioners are cool blasterz, with a "z." I don't know where that came from. I call cakes big old cookies. I call noodles long-ass rice. Fried chicken is fry-fry chicky-chick. Chicken parm is chicky-chicky parm-parm. Chicken cacciatore-- Chicky catch. I call eggs pre-birds or future birds. Root beer is super water. Tortillas are bean blankies. And I call forks... Food rakes.
[back:]
Leslie Knope: Yeah, you can get as many 'serts as you want.
Tom: Well, let's get in my go-go mobile.
[aside to camera:]
Tom: Car.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Leslie Knope: Yellow-haired female likes waffles and news.
Ann: Sexy, well-read blonde loves the sweeter things in life.
Leslie Knope: Much better.
Ann: Hobbies?
Leslie Knope: Organizing my agenda. Wait, that doesn't sound fun. Um, jamming on my planner.
Ann: Favorite place?
Leslie Knope: Upstairs there's this mural of wildflowers, and I like to sit on a bench in front of it.
Ann: Really? It could be anywhere in the world. Paris, Hawaii, the Grand Canyon.
Leslie Knope: No, just the bench in front of the mural.
Ann: What about, like, an actual meadow where wildflowers are?
Leslie Knope: Ew, Ann. I'm scared of bees. Mural.