Ben Quote #147
Quote from Ben in Halloween Surprise
Jennifer Barkley: Mr. Kurtzwilder, it might be helpful if you told us why you want to be governor of Florida.
Howard Kurtzwilder: Well, I guess you could say mine is the classic Florida success story. I went to SFU law school, I was working at a small firm in Orlando, and one day, bam, just like that, gator eats penis.
Ben: Excuse me?
Howard Kurtzwilder: Well, that was my first high profile case. It was a classic Florida divorce. Guy cheats on his wife with Dan Marino's masseuse, one day she cuts his junk off, throws it in the Everglades.
Jennifer Barkley: Why not?
Howard Kurtzwilder: Damn alligator ate it. And that case, that case made my career. Now, I just wanna give something back.
Jennifer Barkley: Frankly, your path to victory is narrow. Governor Scott might be vulnerable, but you have very little name recognition.
Ben: But the Barkley Group is the best at what we do. We're not in the business of losing elections. We can get you where you wanna go.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Halloween Surprise’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Diane Lewis: Hey.
Ron Swanson: Hey.
Diane Lewis: Am I interrupting something important?
Ron Swanson: Impossible. I work for the government.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Martha: So, three bedrooms, two baths, nice big backyard.
Leslie Knope: But no trampoline room, correct?
Martha: Correct. Like all houses in the world, there's no trampoline room.
Leslie Knope: Mm.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: Ben is coming back from D.C. in ten days and we are moving into a house together. He would move into my place, but it's a scary nightmare hoarder nest. His words. And Ann's. And the official report filed by the Health Department.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] I like Diane, but I'm not sure if I'm ready for a whole family. If the kids ever wanted to come to my place, I'd have to take a whole week off work just to undo the alarms and tripwires.