Ron Swanson Quote #39
Quote from Ron Swanson in Ron and Tammy
Leslie Knope: Look, we need to talk. Ron, no. The Planning Department Re-prioritization Document?
Ron Swanson: Calm down, I haven't signed it yet.
Leslie Knope: Yeah, well, you're going to. Because Tammy wants you to, and you do everything that she wants.
Ron Swanson: She made some really good points about libraries.
Leslie Knope: Are you even listening to yourself? You're defending the library now? Ron, the library? Of all the horrifying, miserable things in the world?
Ron Swanson: Some people like libraries.
Leslie Knope: I can't even believe what I'm hearing. "Some people like libraries." Ron, she's in your head. You said that she was a manipulative monster, and you were right.
Ron Swanson: No. No. Tammy's changed.
Leslie Knope: Look me in the eye and tell me that she's changed. Look me in the eye.
Ron Swanson: I'm so screwed, Knope. Her hooks are in my brain.
Leslie Knope: Yep.
Ron Swanson: She has all the power and I have nothing. I'm so little. [sobs]
[Donna places a Post-it note reading "I told ya so" against the glass for Leslie to read]
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Ron and Tammy’ Quotes
Quote from Tom
Tom: Okay. I think you should play this one cool, man. Be the grown-up. Take the high road.
Mark: Yeah.
Tom: Ann's a classy chick. If you get down in the mud, you're just gonna lose her respect.
Mark: You've just made a surprising amount of sense, Tom. Thank you.
[aside to camera:]
Tom: I've never taken the high road. But I tell other people to. 'Cause then there's more room for me on the low road.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Leslie Knope: I see. I knew that you had two ex-wives named Tammy, so I was hoping that there was one that you got along with and...
Ron Swanson: Nope. I hate them both.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: On my deathbed, my final wish is to have my ex-wives rushed to my side, so I can use my dying breath to tell them both to go to hell one last time. Would I get married again? Oh, absolutely. If you don't believe in love, what's the point of living?
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: Of course. That bitch of an ex-wife is working for the library now. That is perfect. The worst person in the world working at the worst place in the world.
Leslie Knope: I have to go talk to her. And you got to give me something I can use. Does she have any weaknesses?
Ron Swanson: No.
Leslie Knope: What do you mean, no? Everybody has a weakness.
Ron Swanson: Not machines. I honestly believe that she was programmed by someone from the future to come back and destroy all happiness.