Jerry Quote #92
Quote from Jerry in Moving Up (Part 1)
Jerry: I got the menus.
Tom: Great. [chuckles] Larry, what the hell? What are these pictures?
Jerry: Aw, jeez, I must have given the printer the wrong flash drive.
Tom: What is this, a rotten grapefruit?
Jerry: No, it's my dog's rectum. Lord Sheldon has a growth, so we're sending pictures over to the vet. But I guess this isn't good for menus, is it?
Tom: Larry, Larry, Larry, listen to me. This is the worst thing you've ever done. I need you to take all of these dog-butt pictures and burn them in the pizza oven. April, you list all the menu items from memory. It'll be classier anyway.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Moving Up (Part 1)’ Quotes
Quote from Jerry
Mitch Savner: Seems like things are a little chaotic.
Tom: No, no, everything is perfect. This is April. She's gonna be taking care of you tonight.
April: Hello, welcome to Tommy's Bistro. Today we have spaghetti, linguine, fettuccini, ravioli, rigatoni, bucatini, lasagna.
Mitch Savner: Could you repeat that?
April: Spaghetti, linguine, fettuccini, ravioli, rigatoni, Ferrari, Lamborghini, bucatini, lasagna.
Mitch Savner: Can I see a menu?
April: We had to throw our menus away because they are covered with pictures of Larry's dog rectum.
Jerry: Great news. Lord Sheldon's gonna make it. Yeah, just have to apply a salve to his anus every hour for the rest of his life, but... Oh, enjoy your meal.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Andy: Last chance, Ron. The slots are finalized, but I can squeeze in ten minutes if a certain mister... [whispering] Duke Silver wanted to come out. Come on, Ron, it's gonna be so fun.
Ron Swanson: Thank you, Andrew, but fun or not, playing music is something I like to keep private, along with my family, my conversations, and my whereabouts at all times.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Tom: We have ten tables booked for the soft opening. It's all friends and family, so hopefully they'll go easy on us. How's it looking, Ron? Maybe speed it up a little?
Ron Swanson: This is not government work. As such, I treat it with care and attention.
Tom: Okay, but also, go faster.