Trevor Nelsson: And finally, here is a check for the entirety of the purchase of Rent-A-Swag. And here is a personal note from my client Dr. Saperstein.
Tom: "Dear Tom, I win. You suck. Turn note over. You still suck. Turn note over." Okay, Saperstein couldn't even face me himself? He had to send in his lackey?
Trevor Nelsson: My client isn't at this meeting because he doesn't have to be. Successful people, Mr. Haverford, use their money to use others to work for them.
Tom: Hmm, it's an interesting idea, lawyer-dude. What if I gave you 5 bucks to put a bag of poop in Saperstein's car?
Trevor Nelsson: No.
Tom: Ballpark me. How much would it cost?
Trevor Nelsson: $10,000.
Tom: Counter-offer: Why don't you just do it for the story?
Trevor Nelsson: Goodbye, Mr. Haverford.