Tom Quote #526
Quote from Tom in Second Chunce
Trevor Nelsson: And finally, here is a check for the entirety of the purchase of Rent-A-Swag. And here is a personal note from my client Dr. Saperstein.
Tom: "Dear Tom, I win. You suck. Turn note over. You still suck. Turn note over." Okay, Saperstein couldn't even face me himself? He had to send in his lackey?
Trevor Nelsson: My client isn't at this meeting because he doesn't have to be. Successful people, Mr. Haverford, use their money to use others to work for them.
Tom: Hmm, it's an interesting idea, lawyer-dude. What if I gave you 5 bucks to put a bag of poop in Saperstein's car?
Trevor Nelsson: No.
Tom: Ballpark me. How much would it cost?
Trevor Nelsson: $10,000.
Tom: Counter-offer: Why don't you just do it for the story?
Trevor Nelsson: Goodbye, Mr. Haverford.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Second Chunce’ Quotes
Quote from April
Tom: Let's see which one of these lucky visionaries is gonna make me rich. Greg Phillips!
Greg Phillips: Hi, guys, thanks for meeting with me.
April: Enough chitchat. What's your pitch, kid? Come on, time is money, money is power, power is pizza, pizza is knowledge. Let's go.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Leslie Knope: Well, this is the Pawnee City Council chambers. Your new home away from me.
Ingrid de Forest: Well, technically, my home away from home is in Zurich. Frank Gehry designed it. But this is nice too.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: Today is my last day [hoarsely] as a-- Excuse me. [clears throat] Let me try this again. Today is [hoarsely] my last day at c-- [full voice] Today is my la-- [high pitched] Today is my last d-- You know what? You get the idea. My old friend Ingrid de Forest won the recall vote, and she's taking my place on Monday morning. But, you know, luckily for me, I've processed all my feelings. And I've gone through the five stages of grief: Denial, anger, Internet commenting, cat adoption, African dance, cat returning to the adoption place, watching all the episodes of Murphy Brown, and not giving a flying fart. How many stages is that? I don't know. The point is I'm fine now.
Quote from Ann
Ann: Hey, let's get some food. I'm starving. Wait, no, I have to pee. Wait, no, I have to barf. Actually, all three. Being pregnant is great.