Schmidt: What is it? Cece? Cecelia? Chechelia? Tell me what are your hopes and dreams? Are you warm? I'm a little, huh, I'm a little warm right now. [takes shirt off]
Nick: Don't, Schmidt.
Coach: All right.
Schmidt: Oh, yeah. There it is. [breathes deeply and flexes]
Cece: Please put your shirt back on. Please don't make me laugh at you.
Schmidt: Can I hit you up with some tea? A little herb tea? Ugh. Oh, my God. How good is that, for real, what? A little P-mint tea? Yum, right? Hot, sweet. A little teabag action. And I wasn't, I wasn't talking about...
Nick: [grabs the douchebag jar] There it is. Douchebag.
Cece: Listen to me you guys, Jess is by far the best person that I know, so if you guys let anything happen to her, I'm gonna come here and crazy murder you.
Schmidt: I'm gonna be honest with you. I did not hear a word you just said 'cause I can kinda see your party hats right now.
Nick: [reaches for the jar again] Here we go.