Captain Stottlemeyer Quote #265
Quote from Captain Stottlemeyer in Mr. Monk Is At Your Service
Captain Stottlemeyer: I told you I'd take care of it.
Adrian Monk: What is it?
Captain Stottlemeyer: It's from the Deputy Commissioner. That's his signature. It says that you, Adrian Monk, are exempt from the current hiring freeze, and when you are ready to come back to work, your badge will be waiting for you.
Natalie: How did you do that?
Captain Stottlemeyer: I talked to the man. I laid it all out.
Lieutenant Disher: He threatened to quit.
Natalie: You did?
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, I was there. It was pretty intense. And I seriously considered quitting.
Captain Stottlemeyer: I wasn't bluffing. I meant it.
Lieutenant Disher: Me too. You could tell I was about to consider it.
‘Mr. Monk Is At Your Service’ Quotes
Quote from Adrian Monk
Natalie: Are you afraid of frogs?
Adrian Monk: I don't know. I've never been this close to one. [A frog lands on Monk's shoe] Yes. The answer is yes. Put frogs on the list. Where's the list?
Natalie: I got it. I got it. Where does it go?
Adrian Monk: Put them between possums and, uh, soccer riots. No, no, no. Uh, after after soccer riots. And before, uh, before hailstones. Yeah, so it goes...
Natalie: I got it, I got it: Soccer riots, frogs, hailstones.
Adrian Monk: At least now we know. Information really is power.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: I've divided the house into four zones.
Susie: Mr. Stilson usually just has us start in the kitchen.
Adrian Monk: Mr. Stilson is no longer with us. So from now on, we're going to be cleaning the house my way. The Monk way.
Susie: Who's Monk?
Adrian Monk: You see, I grew up in a monastery. And the monks were very demanding. We were cleaning constantly. Mostly dusting. It was very dusty. Crypts, catacombs. It was holy dust. But still... You know, dust. That is the Monk way.
Paul Buchanan: Well, you heard the man. We'll be doing it the Monk way.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Captain Stottlemeyer: As a butler?
Lieutenant Disher: A house manager. They prefer house manager.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Why?
Adrian Monk: I'm good at it.
Captain Stottlemeyer: No, you're good at this. You're good at being a cop.
Adrian Monk: Really? The department doesn't seem to think so.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Oh, I get it. Those sons of bitches and the hiring freeze. Look, Monk, I told you I am working on that, okay? Just give me a little more time.
Adrian Monk: It's too late, Captain. I've moved on. It's a new dawn.
Lieutenant Disher: What about Natalie?
Adrian Monk: I'm hoping that Natalie will remain in my employ. There is a position opening up in the kitchen. Speaking of kitchens, I really must get back. I have a duck in the oven that's not going to braise itself. And the master is very particular about that sort of thing. [exits]