Jay Quote #466

Quote from Jay in Snip

Doctor: So, would you like to know if you're having a boy or a girl?
Jay: Yes.
Gloria: No. Ay. I want it to be a surprise, don't you, Jay?
[aside to camera:]
Jay: I'm having a baby at 65. You want another surprise, Gloria? Buy yourself a box of Cracker Jacks.

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 ‘Snip’ Quotes

Quote from Manny

Gloria: Manny, you don't seem so happy. You usually love when I pull you out of school to play hockey.
Manny: "A," it's "hooky," and "B," don't ever take me out of school to play hockey.
Gloria: Did something bad happen at school?
Manny: They fired the music teacher.
Gloria: Mr. Hideo Namagachi?
Manny: That you say perfectly.

Quote from Claire

Phil: [on the phone] Claire, where are you?
Claire: Oh, honey, I just had a hellish experience at the post office. I have post-post office traumatic stress disorder.
Phil: Nailed it.

Quote from Phil

Claire: Is there anything else you need for your procedure?
Phil: Um, I think I'm supposed to have ice cream.
Claire: Hmm. Actually, I don't-
Phil: I'm sorry. Is it a vasecto-you, or a vasectomy?