Jay Quote #1522
Gloria: How did it go? Are they giving Jay an award?
Manny: No. They said it would set a very dangerous precedent. And in perfect English. Turns out this whole misunderstanding was completely avoidable.
Gloria: We need to figure out something. Jay can never find out that Earl got an award instead of him.
Manny: Wow. Look at this place. The craftsmanship, the architecture. They say the domed ceiling acts as a whisper chamber.
Gloria: What does "whisper chamber" mean?
Jay: [whispering] It means I heard everything you just said. [normal voice] I have to turn my TV up to 40, but that was loud and clear!
Modern Family Quotes
‘Paris’ Quotes
Quote from Phil
[aside to camera:]
Phil: Claire was about to meet Clive Bixby's French cousin, Claude. The plan was simple enough. All I did was create a fake work emergency and wait for Claire at her favorite café. [French accent] Welcome to France. What is the purpose of your visit? L'amour. Just answer the question, sir! [normal voice] Oh, I'm s-so sorry. Um, business... [French accent] of l'amour.
Quote from Mitchell
Mitchell: [aside to camera] It was easy to fit in. All I had to do was look good and have a lot of attitude. Paris was just like one big gay bar.
Quote from Phil
Phil: Alright, big day. Lots of plans. First thing's first, getting into character.
Claire: Oh.
Phil: [French accent] Claude Bixby, mustard magnate with a flair for...
Claire: Uh, Phil... Claude... I-I love that you're doing all of this, but doesn't some tiny part of you feel guilty for ditching Guy? I mean, he did wait for me for 30 years. We could invite him for a glass of wine.
Phil: [sighs] [normal voice] Fine. But I'm warning you, if he gets out of line, Claude knows karate. And Krav Maga. He's Jewish on his mother's side.