Dewey Quote #411
Quote from Dewey in Dewey's Special Class
Dewey: Why do all our art projects use tissues?
Mr. Sheridan: Because tissues are soft and nontoxic. This way no one gets hurt, and no one sues the school. This program can't handle another lawsuit, Dewey. I only get paid for four days a week as it is.
Dewey: But it's ridiculous. We have to do math without pencils. We have to do history without hard-cover books. Can't we at least have some art supplies?
Mr. Sheridan: Art supplies mean scissors. They mean paste. These children stab with scissors. They eat paste. Some of them tried to eat scissors. This one tried to stab with paste.
Dewey: Teachers are supposed to help their students. Maybe you wouldn't be so unhappy all the time if you tried a little harder.
Mr. Sheridan: Look, Dewey, you're not going to make it through the year with that attitude. You just have to take all your hopes and dreams and let them die. Then maybe you won't end up staring at a clock at 4:00 in the morning wishing you had kissed more ass in grad school.
Hansen: Thanks for trying.
Chad: I swear, if you can get the paste, I'll stab him for you.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Dewey's Special Class’ Quotes
Quote from Otto
Otto: Distinguished guests, friends, members of the press... when the Fish Defense League told me that the dam on our property was blocking the endangered silverback trout from its natural breeding grounds, I was glad to help. And so today, we are going to blow up this evil dam. Afterwards, we will have a nice, light lunch provided by the Grotto, a friend of fish and the business traveler. Here we go!
Francis: That's weird. From here, the dynamite looks a lot like a picnic cooler.
[When Otto presses the ignition key, a flat-bed truck behind them goes up in flames]
Otto: I am starting to think that that is a picnic cooler.
Quote from Lois
Lois: [cutesy voice to Jamie] ...and then he was chopped up and eaten by wolves, because that's what happens to babies who pull hair.
Quote from Reese
Dewey: So the school thinks I might be a genius, too? But I'm not a whiny loudmouth who complains about everything.
Reese: Malcolm's a genius, and now Dewey's a genius? I guess it's only a matter of time 'till we find out that I'm a genius. I wonder what kind of genius I am. 15 times 32 is 3,989.
Malcolm: It's 480.
Reese: Okay, so I'm not Rain Man, big deal. Some day they'll invent a machine that does that stuff for you, anyway.