Otto: Distinguished guests, friends, members of the press... when the Fish Defense League told me that the dam on our property was blocking the endangered silverback trout from its natural breeding grounds, I was glad to help. And so today, we are going to blow up this evil dam. Afterwards, we will have a nice, light lunch provided by the Grotto, a friend of fish and the business traveler. Here we go!
Francis: That's weird. From here, the dynamite looks a lot like a picnic cooler.
[When Otto presses the ignition key, a flat-bed truck behind them goes up in flames]
Otto: I am starting to think that that is a picnic cooler.

Lois: [cutesy voice to Jamie] ...and then he was chopped up and eaten by wolves, because that's what happens to babies who pull hair.

Dewey: So the school thinks I might be a genius, too? But I'm not a whiny loudmouth who complains about everything.
Reese: Malcolm's a genius, and now Dewey's a genius? I guess it's only a matter of time 'till we find out that I'm a genius. I wonder what kind of genius I am. 15 times 32 is 3,989.
Malcolm: It's 480.
Reese: Okay, so I'm not Rain Man, big deal. Some day they'll invent a machine that does that stuff for you, anyway.