Lois: What? You can't sleep?
Hal: No, I have this terrible feeling we've forgotten something. Let's see: trash, locks, lights... Oh, well, whatever it is, I'm sure it can wait until tomorrow morning.
[the next morning, Hal and Lois walk into the kitchen and find Dewey stood in a corner facing the wall:]
Hal: Oh, boy. Alright, son... Son, I think you've learned your lesson.
Dewey: Ok. Thanks, Dad.
Hal: We've got to stop doing this.

Francis: I can't believe this. I bought my own bus ticket home to spend the whole weekend with you.
Craig: I hear you. It's a shame you had to spend your own money. I discovered a way you can travel for free through the Internet.
Francis: What? Hacking into the airline's reservation system?
Craig: No, that's illegal. I go to a chat room and pretend to be a really hot 18-year-old girl. I'm Debbie. Blond, naive and I love to wear sundresses. Right now I'm having a lot of problems at home. Dad's so mean. I'm going through all these changes. All these strange new feelings. He just doesn't under...
Francis: The free travel?
Craig: Right. Debbie goes to this chat room. She gets really friendly with some lonely guy. Before long he's willing to pay for a visit. Right now I'm sitting on a ticket to Tampa. But I make sure he buys Debbie full fare coach with no restriction. She may look good in thong, but she's no dummy.
Francis: Sweet.

Craig: M, Z, R, Y, C... Nice try. What's that supposed to mean?
Francis: Mzryc. It's another military term. You know, the helmets that horses wear.
Craig: Oh, right, right, right. This is nice. Hanging out on a Saturday, playing Scrabble, couple of guys relaxing. So your folks get along okay?
Francis: What?
Craig: Nothing. Here we go. Read it and weep.
Francis: C, A, T. Hey, that's two "cat"s for you, that's great.
Craig: Just playing the tiles I'm dealt. So, uh, you pick up any bad vibes here on the home front, you let me know, right?
Francis: Why?
Craig: Hey, take it easy cowboy, just making small talk.
Francis: Okay, I guess they're doing fine.
Craig: She's a strong little lady that mother of yours. Sure, we have our moments at work, but you can't stay mad at this woman for long.
Francis: You don't have to live with her.
Craig: Maybe you just don't understand her.
Francis: What's to understand? She's a total control freak.
Craig: Maybe she doesn't get the support she needs here at home.
Francis: Well, I wouldn't know since she sent me to military school.
Craig: Because you're a spoiled brat. And I'm pretty sure that mzryc ends in a K.