Francis: [on the phone] Mom, just calm down!
Lois: I was in jail, Francis! Jail! All because you didn't pay your parking tickets! How could you have gotten 16 parking tickets?!
Francis: It's not my fault. You keep me stuck here. When I come home, I have so much living to do, I don't have time to look for legal parking.
Lois: You listen, mister. Your irresponsible behavior has finally caught up with you, and you are going to suffer the consequences! You are paying those parking tickets!
Francis: You know, Mom, jail has really hardened you.
Lois: I'm serious, Francis, you are paying us back that money for those tickets plus $145 to get the car out of impound. That means you owe us $747.13.
Francis: This is totally unfair! None of this would have happened if you weren't such a reckless driver.
Lois: Excuse me?
Francis: When I parked too close to a mailbox, I didn't endanger anybody's life.
Lois: I didn't endanger anyone. I was pulled over by a corrupt cop for a traffic violation that I didn't commit.
Francis: Oh, but when I tell you I've been framed by the police, you send me to military school. Ironic, isn't it?
Lois: That cop was out to get me.
Francis: Of course he was. Everyone's out to get you. And the neighbor's cat's the ringleader. Didn't you know that?
Lois: Ha-ha, you can laugh all you want, Francis, but until you come up with the money, you are not coming home.
Francis: Where am I supposed to get $700? You're just using this as an excuse to keep me here.
Lois: Yeah, that's right. It was the cat's idea.