Lois Quote #616
Quote from Lois in Reese vs. Stevie
Lois: So, there I am, 13 years old, flat-chested as I can be, everyone around me is sprouting, and I'm feeling just horrible about myself. And why? No reason at all. I'm getting straight A's, I'm running the food drive, I'm all-county on the gymnastics team, and none of this means anything to me because I'm so fixated on my bustline. [sobs] And so like an idiot, I started stuffing my bra with toilet paper. Even after all these years, I remember every morning in the bathroom, shoving these things down my shirt and feeling like such an awkward, ugly, little girl. [Jamie knocks a box of tissues off the table] Thank you. Of course in second-period Spanish I had to sit next to the snooty Janice Montgomery with her tangerine nail polish, which I was dying to try, but of course she wouldn't let me because I had drugstore shoes.
Malcolm: [enters] Hey, Mom.
Lois: [holds up a pillowcase to her face] Look at these stains. You boys are in so much trouble. No more pillowcases for a month.
Reese: Okay.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Reese vs. Stevie’ Quotes
Quote from Reese
[When Lois pulls into the driveway with a car full of groceries, she is listening to an audio book, "A Dish Served Deadsly" ]
Man: [on tape] While Betty kept the fat man occupied, I ducked down the hallway to his office.
If I found his phone records, they would prove that he was the one who called the police station on the night of the murder.
[that night, Lois is still in the car listening to the tape as she eats the food she bought:]
Man: [on tape] All I knew was, the next person through that door would be the man who killed my partner. "Hello, McKendrick," I heard from behind me. I spun around, but standing there was...
Reese: [on tape] A stupid housewife who wouldn't let her son buy nunchuks even though they're totally safe.
Lois: Reese!
Quote from Lois
Lois: All right, Jamie. The doctor said there's no physical reason you can't talk, so that is exactly what you are going to do. Talk. He said the best way to get you started is for me to talk to you constantly about everything happening around you so that you live in a more verbal world. That means Mommy's going to narrate everything she's doing, like right now when she's going over here to make you a snack. Then it'll be time to do the laundry, and after that she gets to make dinner for the whole family. Who will wolf it down in ten seconds and leave her to do the dishes by herself before she gets to make the boys' lunches for school the next day. Then she'll get ready for bed after everybody else. And discover that the bathroom is a swampy, hairy mess, and Mommy gets to spend her last waking minutes with a sponge and a can of cleanser. Then it'll be time to wake up in the morning and she'll do it all over again. Day after day, week after week, for the next 30 years until Mommy dies. And with Mommy's luck, even that won't be the end of it!
Quote from Abe
Abe: Ah. There you are. Stevie, you ran off without your backup inhaler.
Stevie: Thanks... Dad.
Abe: Did Stevie tell you his big news?
Malcolm: No. What's going on?
Abe: Stevie's been accepted as a research subject at the Norvet Biomedical Institute. Dr. Norvet himself picked him for the motor-neuropathy program.
Stevie: It's... nothing.
Abe: Nothing? Come on, Stevie. This is the most exciting thing that's happened to us since they put your stomach on the inside. Who knows? This Christmas might just be our first ski vacation.
Stevie: Dad.
Abe: Tomorrow after school we'll go look at snowboards.
Stevie: Dad.
Abe: I said just look.