Barney Quote #73
Ted: I should really make this call.
Robin: Ooh, can I do it?
Barney: [answers phone] Hello?
Robin: Hi there, sexy.
Barney: Hello, Aunt Kathy, what's up?
Robin: Oh, nothing. Just sitting here, thinking about you, hot stuff.
Barney: An accident? Well, is Uncle Rudy gonna be OK?
Robin: Aunt Kathy's got an itch that only you can scratch, big boy.
Barney: Oh God! Why did he think he could build his own helicopter?
Robin: Come on, daddy, break me off a piece of that white chocolate.
Barney: Well, if he needs a transplant, he can have mine. I'll be right there. You know, I... [stammers to his date, gets up, walks past Ted and Robin] See you guys later.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘The Duel’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Barney: Katie's here. Okay, real quick, last night, epiphany! I realized what the world of dating needs. Ready? A lemon law.
Robin: A lemon law, like for cars.
Barney: Exactly. From the moment the date begins you have five minutes to decide whether you're going to commit to an entire evening. And if you don't, it's no hard feelings just "Good night, thanks for playing, see you never." Huh? Huh? The Lemon Law. It's gonna be a thing. Possibly starting right now.
Quote from Barney
Barney: So, anyway, I was on date with this girl, Jackie.
[flashback to MacLaren's:]
Barney: Wow, Jackie, you make a really great first impression. I have a feeling that tonight you might end up being Jackie... Oh!
Jackie: Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to lemon law you.
[back:]
Barney: It's out there, it's a thing. The lemon law is a thing. Damn, I should have called it Barney's law.
Quote from Lily
Ted: Chinese restaurant, I still don't believe it.
Lily: I told you. Okay, a toast. Life is full of changes. One day you have an apartment, the next day it's a house of dumplings. But the important stuff doesn't change. To the important stuff.
All: Cheers.
Barney: And to the lemon law. Self-clink.
Lily: And by the way, I bought these glasses. I bought them at Ikea. These are my glasses.
Marshall: I love this song. I haven't heard this in forever.
Lily: I'm pretty sure this is a mixed tape you made me in sophomore year.
Robin: Lily, your apartment makes the best Shanghai dumplings.
Marshall: [on tape] I love you, Lily. Happy Valentine's Day 1998.