Ted Quote #325
Quote from Ted in Little Boys
Lily: So, Robin, I've got a guy for you. He's cute, he's funny, he's smart.
Ted: What's his 'but'?
Lily: What do you mean?
Ted: When someone wants to set you up they always tell you the good qualities first but then they leave out their huge flaw.
[flashback to Barney talking to Ted in MacLaren's:]
Barney: She's totally hot and really fun. [inner monologue] But she has a dead tooth.
[flashback to Marshall telling Ted about a woman at MacLaren's:]
Marshall: She's superhot and she's so successful. [inner monologue] But she has a pug that she pushes around in a stroller.
[flashback to Lily telling Ted about a woman at MacLaren's:]
Lily: She's so cute and she's so smart. [inner monologue] But her last boyfriend had to get a restraining order against her and then his cat and new vacuum cleaner both went missing.
Ted: Wow, set it up.
[present:]
Ted: I'm still convinced she killed my turtle.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Little Boys’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Barney: OK, I've got it. Here, put on this eye patch.
Ted: Why?
Barney: The ultimate ice breaker. [puts on an eye patch] A bunch of cobras got loose in Central Park. You and I are jogging, training for the Death Valley Iron Man. No big deal, we do it every year. Suddenly we see these snake bastards sneaking towards a little baby. Not on our watch. You grab the kid, I strangle six cobras with my bare hands. Women of New York, one at a time please.
Ted: So, what are the eye patches for?
Barney: We got bit.
Ted: On the eye?
Barney: Yes.
Ted: Both of us.
Barney: They're different eyes. I don't see why this bugs you. Patch up!
Quote from Robin
[Doug eats his cereal as Robin reads the newspaper at the dining table]
Doug: What are you reading?
Robin: The business section. The Fed's gonna lower rates again to bail out these subprime lenders, bunch of idiots.
Doug: Miss Aldrin says it's not nice to call people names.
Robin: Well, maybe if they weren't such idiots, I wouldn't have to call them that.
Doug: That's what I said. You're pretty cool.
Robin: You too.
Quote from Robin
Robin: Why is this kid around anyway? Shouldn't he be with his mom? What kind of lawyer does this guy have if he has to take care of the kid all the time?
Lily: A good one. He won full custody.
Robin: He won? He won. Oh God, getting the kid is winning, isn't it? [Lily nods] Don't tell anyone I said that.