Ted Quote #288
Ted: Hey, so I think I figured out how to do your toast in a completely appropriate way.
Marshall: Finally.
Ted: Yeah. "Good evening. I'm Ted Mosby, Marshall's best man."
Marshall: Still strong, right?
Ted: Great, yeah. I'd like to share with you all a story about the momentous evening last fall when Marshall and Lily got back together. Afterward, we stayed up till 10:00 at night, doing shots of chocolate milk.
[flashback:]
Ted: Man, I'm well nourished right now!
Barney: Calcium promotes healthy teeth and bones.
Robin: Thanks, Marshall, for teaching us you don't need alcohol to have fun.
Marshall: Oh, don't thank me. Thank my parents for teaching me good values.
Ted: [v.o.] Now, I wasn't supposed to hear this next part, but Marshall leaned over to Lily and whispered.
Marshall: You know what I'd like to do to you right now? I'd like to hold your hand. I'd like to hold your hand so hard that you're not able to shake hands for a week.
Ted: [v.o.] Then a little later, Robin caught them... Um... holding hands. End flashback. It was a lovely and responsible night. To Marshall and Lily.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Showdown’ Quotes
Quote from Loretta
Ted: Your dad is Bob Barker?
Barney: That's right
Lily: The host of The Price Is Right, Bob Barker?
Barney: That's Pops.
Robin: Barney?
Barney: Yes, Robin?
Robin: Why in the world do you think Bob Barker is your father?
Barney: Uh, because my mother told me he was, that's why.
[flashback to Barney as a kid, watching The Price is Right:]
Young Barney: Mom, who's my dad? All the other kids at school know who their dad is. Who's mine?
Loretta: Oh, I don't know. That guy. [points to Barney on TV]
Quote from Barney
Robin: Barney, I didn't know you were such a fan of The Price is Right.
Barney: Are you kidding? T.P.I.R. is not just an indescribably entertaining hour of television, it's a microcosm of our entire economic system, a capitalist utopia, where consumers are rewarded for their persistence, market acumen and intrepid spirit. I gaze upon the glory of The Price Is Right, and I see the face of America. And it is divine. Plus, you know, hot chicks on sports cars.
Quote from Barney
Barney: You guys know how it's hard to be friends with me 'cause I'm so awesome?
Ted: Yes, it's hard to be friends with you. Go on.
Barney: Well, this isn't going to make it any easier. I am going to be on... The Price Is Right.
Marshall: No way!
Ted: What?!
Barney: Yes, in a couple days, Rich Fields is going to call out my name, and I will come on down.
Marshall: Whoa, that is so awesome.