Jill: Wow. This is so weird, to see you in jail. Maybe we should get some of these bars at home.
Tim: Only if I can bring my friends.
Jill: You OK? Some of these guys seem a little scary.
Tim: Scariest person in here? Al.
Al: [to Ilene] I'll tell you, the only thing that got me through this ordeal was knowing you were waiting for me.
Ilene: Oh!
Tim: Can we continue the epic love story Chained Flannel after we get outta here?

Tim: Sorry about you not seeing the play tonight.
George: Well, why don't you go back tomorrow?
Jill: Tomorrow?
George: Traditionally there's a matinee on Sunday. Curtain's at two.
Tim: George, could we...?
George: You could have a nice brunch.
Jill: Well, that sounds nice.
George: Then go see the play.
Jill: Sounds lovely.
George: Maybe afterwards, you stop and you get her a nice tattoo.
Tim: You know, when you put it that way, honey, there's a whole day of activity right there. Maybe a little battleship across your cleavage. I think George, you could probably do it yourself.
George: Oh, yeah. Definitely.

Tim: [wakes up] Yeah! Bravo! Boy, bravo! That Waiting For Godot, that was a good play. I wish there were more of it.
Ilene: Oh, there's more. This is only the intermission.
Tim: You serious? I gotta sit through more of this crap?