Tim: Forgive me, but explain to me again what a hysterectomy is.
Dr. Fields: Well, it's where we remove her uterus.
Jill: It's major surgery.
Tim: Oh, boy.
Dr. Fields: The good news here is that these fibroid tumors are almost always benign.
Jill: Ninety-nine percent of the time. That's what you said, right?
Dr. Fields: That's right.

Jill: When do we have to do this?
Dr. Fields: I can work you in on Friday.
Jill: Friday? That's too soon.
Tim: If you need surgery, there's no reason to wait, honey.
Jill: I have to finish my thesis. Can't we do this, like, a week after next?
Dr. Fields: No. Unfortunately, I'm leaving on Saturday for three weeks. I don't think it's a good idea for you to wait that long.
Jill: Well, I guess I could just try to finish my thesis by Friday, and whatever I don't finish, I'll just do while I'm recovering.
Dr. Fields: Good. Then I'll schedule you. You have any questions?
Jill: How long do I have to be in the hospital?
Dr. Fields: About three days.

Tim: Schmetterling, that's a German name, correct?
Dolph: It means butterfly.
Tim: Well, you must've been a pretty big larva as a kid.
Dolph: Is that supposed to be funny?
Tim: Not if you don't think so.
Dolph: I don't.