Kirk Quote #72
Taylor Doose: I come to announce to one and all that the day we all thought would never get here has arrived.
Kirk: Arbor Day?
Taylor Doose: No.
Kirk: The Day of Reckoning?
Taylor Doose: No.
Kirk: The day the music died?
Taylor Doose: Kirk.
Quote from Miss Patty
Miss Patty: Now it all starts.
Lorelai: What all starts, honey?
Miss Patty: First Fran, then the rest of us.
Lorelai: Patty, it's not the plague. It was just her time.
Miss Patty: I can't go.
Lorelai: Yes, you can. Come on.
Miss Patty: No, just leave me.
Lorelai: I'm gonna get her to the church.
Rory: I'll meet you there.
Lorelai: Come on, let's go.
Miss Patty: You know, it's times like these that you realize what is truly important in your life. I'm so glad I had all that sex. [sobs]
Quote from Luke
Luke: I'm in bed. I have ten more minutes to sleep. Not a lot of time in the grand scheme of things, but still, ten minutes is ten minutes. You know what I mean.
Lorelai: Sure, yeah.
Rory: Ten minutes is great.
Luke: And then the phone rings, and it just rings and rings and rings and rings, so I pick it up.
Lorelai: And then hopefully got your hearing checked.
Luke: Can I finish my story?
Lorelai: I'm just saying, that's a lot of rings.
Luke: And on the other end of the phone is someone named John who says he's Kyle's father, and Kyle threw a party last night without permission. And two guys got into a fight and tore the place apart, so John wants me to come down and take a look at the damage and discuss some sort of solution to the problem of the damages. Now, I don't know John, and I certainly don't know Kyle, but I do know someone who would get into a fight at a party and leave the place completely trashed. It's a wild guess, but I think his name rhymes with Tess. So here I am, heading in there to talk to John about Kyle and discuss what is to be done about the Hummel.
Lorelai: The what?
Quote from Blame Booze and Melville
Kirk: Sally Forth is on fire today. On fire!
Luke: Where did you get a quarter of a million dollars!
Kirk: What? I don't have a quarter of a million dollars.
Luke: You don't?
Kirk: No. Just shy. It's $247,868. Sixty-seven, if I get a couple of donuts to go. Those chocolate raised are calling my name.
Luke: Where the hell did you get that much money?
Kirk: I've been working for eleven years, Luke. I've had fifteen thousand jobs. I've saved every dollar I've ever made. That and the miracle of compound interest has created a bounty of a quarter of a million dollars. Again, just under. I don't want to brag.
Quote from Tippecanoe and Taylor, Too
Kirk: I took it upon myself to poll the town, and I think you're gonna be pretty happy with the results.
Sookie: We are?
Kirk: Jackson is solidly in the lead.
Lorelai: We just started bugging people.
Kirk: Well, I modeled my poll after the Gallup poll. The Gallup poll uses a sample of 1,005 voters to represent the 280 million people of the United States. Using that logic, the correct sampling size of the town of Stars Hollow would be 0.002. Rounding that up means one person needs to be polled, so I picked me.
Lorelai: You polled yourself?
Kirk: I was right there. Seemed like a perfect opportunity.