Frasier: All right, just hold it. Nobody's canceling anything. For God's sake, the man just fell down a flight of stairs
today, he could hardly have been hurt worse stumbling in a carpeted hallway.
[The elevator door opens to reveal Rebecca, just as Frasier tries to lift Martin from the ground]
Frasier: Get up, ya big crybaby. No pain, no gain.
Martin: Oh, no, but it hurts!
Frasier: Oh, Dad, boo-hoo! I want you out of here! I don't care if you have to crawl like a bog turtle! ... Oh, Rebecca. I didn't see you standing there. Why don't you just step on over my father, help yourself to some wine?
Rebecca: What kind of a heartless bastard are you?
Frasier: Oh, no, Rebecca, you don't understand. It's not the way it looks. He's very resilient! He's been shot before!

Niles: I'm not interrupting anything personal, am I?
Roz: Yeah, Niles, we just eloped. I'm your new mom.
Niles: Well, I'll be a son of a bitch.

Martin: [o.s] Niles, which wall should I hang my swordfish on?
Niles: None of them! I just had that room frescoed!