Niles Quote #538

Quote from Niles in A Word to the Wiseguy

Niles: This morning, for the first time since our separation, Maris actually picked up the phone and called me. She needs a favor.
Frasier: Well, Niles, I think that's hardly cause to celebrate. She called you just because she wants something?
Niles: No, no, not "wants," Frasier; "needs." This is my chance to show her how necessary I really am to her, and all I have to do is fix one small problem.
Martin: What's the problem?
Niles: Uh, she's wanted by the police. Apparently, she was driving past a shoe store last week, when she spotted a stunning pair of Ferragamo pumps. Well, I need not remind you what effect a Ferragamo sighting can have on Maris's hand-eye coordination. She drove up on the sidewalk, and when the police ran her name through the computer they found quite a little backlog of unpaid parking tickets.

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 ‘A Word to the Wiseguy’ Quotes

Quote from Frasier

Daphne: What a horrible thing to happen. Can you picture poor Mrs. Crane confined to a jail cell?
Frasier: Only if they moved the bars closer together.

Quote from Frasier

Frasier: Just show him the charges, Niles.
Niles: Yes, here we are. Quite a few.
Jerome: "Ignoring a summons, speeding, reckless endangerment." Your wife sounds like a very carefree lady.
Frasier: Oh, yes. She's ounces of fun.

Quote from Frasier

Frasier: What else would you expect from a woman who thinks her chocolate allergy entitles her to park in a handicapped space?