Ray Quote #1580
Quote from Ray in Sweet Charity
Ray: You know what Robert is? He's a competitive, selfish, little, tiny, pea-brained giant, and a hack!
Debra: What are you talking about?
Ray: He waited till there was an opening, then he snuck into the hospital to steal my thunder.
Debra: Why was Robert at the hospital?
Ray: To steal my thunder! He-he comes in there with his idiotic little Timmy doll and his lame jokes and his lips moving all around. "Oh, Raymond. What, are you here for your emergency nose reduction?"
Debra: Timmy said that to you? [laughs]
Ray: It's not funny. It's stupid. And they were all laughing at it, all of them the nurses, the patients like the funniest thing they ever heard. If that's what they want, they can have it. I'm not going back to that place. Saint Stupid Stupid Hospital for the Incurably Stupid.
Debra: So you're quitting?
Ray: Yes. Yeah, that's right. That's right. I quit.
Debra: Well, if you don't think you should go back, then you shouldn't go.
Ray: Well, I don't, so I won't! He doesn't even bother to dress the dummy up like a doctor or a nurse. He's such a hack!
Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes
‘Sweet Charity’ Quotes
Quote from Robert
Robert: Now, Timmy, that's a little rude. These kind people didn't come here to get insulted. [as Timmy] "Then maybe they should close their robes!"
Ray: What are you doing?
Robert: Now, Timmy, it won't do to have you talk like that while you're on duty, so let me remove your badge. "Gentle. It's nailed on. I hope the doctors here have some wood glue!"
Ray: That doesn't make sense. It's not a wood puppet.
Woman: Shh!
Robert: "All right. Now I can loosen up. Hello, doll face. What's your name?"
Margaret: Margaret.
Robert: "Well, you're a real looker. Maybe if you break your hip, I can be your splint. Ha-cha-cha-cha!" Easy, Timmy! I'm sorry.
Ray: He's not wood. He's made of plastic.
Robert: "Hey, folks, what do you think this guy's doing in the hospital, huh? Probably dropped in for an emergency nose reduction. Ladies and gentlemen, my cousin Pinocchio!"
Quote from Ray
Ray: All right, listen, Mrs. Gorman, I was just seeing if maybe I could get you to take your pills.
Mrs. Gorman: Fix my radio, I'll take a pill.
Ray: I don't know how to fix a radio.
Mrs. Gorman: Then you've used up what's left of my life for nothing.
Ray: Okay then. Well, nice talking to you, ma'am.
Mrs. Gorman: You sit in the press box?
Ray: What, at the game?
Mrs. Gorman: Yeah. I've never sat in a press box before.
Ray: Well, um, if you want to sit in a press box, you've got to get better. And if you want to get better you've got to take your pills.
Mrs. Gorman: Oh, you tricky, tricky white boy.
Quote from Debra
Debra: You know what? Just forget it.
Ray: Wh- You see? This is what I don't like about charities. It's all about making people feel guilty.
Debra: What? What did I do? I'm not trying to make you feel guilty. I asked you to volunteer for something. You refused. Your guilt is your own.
Ray: You know how to work it.
Debra: Look, Ray, all I'm saying is that I just really love the charities that I'm involved with. And I feel like we have a lot and I really enjoy giving something back. I mean, that's what people do.
Ray: No, they don't!
Debra: All right, you know what? I'm not gonna argue with you. If you don't want to volunteer at the hospital, you don't have to. This is between you and Him.
Ray: Oh, you are shameless! Don't- Don't bring Him into it, okay? That's not gonna work with me. Take it back!