Chris Quote #576
Quote from Chris in Everybody Hates Varsity Jackets
[fantasy:]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I'd get respect.
Joey Caruso: Good morning, sir. Here are your books. What time would you like to smack the crap out of me?
Chris: 2:30.
Joey Caruso: Thank you, sir.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I'd get perks.
Ms. Morello: Chris, you're excused from all of your classes. Professor Lee will be taking them for you.
Chris: Is he smart?
Ms. Morello: Chris, he's Asian. [gong sounds] If you could turn his smart into Black, he'd be darker than Yaphet Kotto in a pot of chocolate.
Chris: Cool.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] If Yaphet Kotto fell into your pot of chocolate, how would you know? And I'd get the only thing I really cared about: girls.
Girls: Good morning, Chris.
Chris: Good morning, angels.
[reality:]
Joey Caruso: [steps on Chris's sneaker] Watch it, Jabbar.
Greg: Oh, man, he scuffed your shoe.
Chris: I don't care about this shoe. I want to get one of them letters.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] And the letter's gonna get me one of those girls.
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Varsity Jackets’ Quotes
Quote from Chris
Ms. Morello: So, what have you prepared for us, Chris?
Chris: I would like to do a selection from Uncle Ben's Cabin.
Ms. Morello: You mean Uncle Tom's Cabin?
Chris: No. Uncle Ben's. It's a lesser known work by Mark Twain's cousin, Dwayne.
Ms. Morello: Dwayne Twain?
Chris: Yes.
Ms. Morello: Go ahead.
Chris: Rice, rice, rice. You think all I knows is rice? I was there when George Washington Carver shucked that first peanut. I make yams and corn and cotton, but all America wants is them little grains of rice. I gives and I gives, till I can't gives no more. Still I rise.
Ms. Morello: Oh, Chris, I have just the part for you in our next production.
Quote from Chris
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Wanting a letter was one thing, figuring out how to get it was a whole other story.
Chris: How am I supposed to get a letter in a sport when I'm terrible at sports?
Greg: Maybe there's something a guy like you would be good at.
Chris: I need a sport without water, balls, hoops, hurdles, bats, cleats, clubs, gloves, tracks, fields, weights or boards.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Isn't that cheerleading?
Quote from Julius
Chris: You know, these shakes would be really good with a burger and some fries. Can we get some real food?
Tonya: Yeah. I'm hungry.
Drew: Me too.
Julius: Look, why don't we all just give this diet a chance? I think it's pretty good, actually.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father didn't really like the shakes. He just found out it was cheaper than groceries.
Julius: And, you know, since we've been on this diet, I've saved over $50 in groceries.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Told you.