Chris Quote #469
Quote from Chris in Everybody Hates Tattaglia
Adult Chris: [v.o.] In a school that was seven-percent Latino, nine-percent Black and three-percent Asian, I somehow ended up in a class that was 99.9% White.
Thurman: Everybody take a seat, take a seat. What are you doing in here?
Chris: It's my class. You're Mr. Thurman, right?
Thurman: No, genius, I'm Mr. Magoo. You don't belong in here.
Chris: Why not?
Thurman: You're Black, you're Black, you're the Black guy.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I took a wrong turn and ended up in South Africa.
Chris: What's that got to do with anything?
Thurman: You're gonna disturb my balance. You're like Crispus Attucks in the Boston Massacre. Whatever happens in here, good or bad, we're all gonna end up talking about you. I'm doing it already and I'm sick of it.
Chris: Listen here, Mr. Magoo, I would love to leave, but I ain't got nowhere else to go.
Thurman: Oh, what's the matter? What are you, what are you, Cuban? Hmm? Go ahead, sit down, sit down. Don't touch anybody, huh? And it's Thurman. Magoo's a joke.
Chris: Hilarious.
Thurman: No, no, not here. You people like to march, right? March your way to the back of the class. Go ahead.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] He was afraid I'd bring the property value of his classroom down.
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Tattaglia’ Quotes
Quote from Tonya
Tonya: So I'm getting fired for being honest?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] It happened to Don Imus. It could happen to you.
Rochelle: I'm sorry, but yes.
Tonya: You know what? I don't need this mess! My father has two jobs!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Deja vu. My mother would have snatched the naps out of Tonya's head, but at that moment, she was just too proud.
Quote from Tonya
Adult Chris: [v.o.] When my mother told Tonya she could say anything she wanted, Tonya took her at her word.
[montage:]
Tonya: Did you dye your hair blond or did you dye your eyebrows black?
Tonya: Your perm looks nice, but what's wrong with your toenails?
Tonya: Should you be using food stamps to pay for this?
Quote from Rochelle
Julius: Vanessa hit the number and bought Pam out.
Rochelle: Yeah, now I'm the new manager.
Drew: What happened to your old job?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Something that hadn't happened in a long time.
[flashback to Rochelle at the Department of Records:]
Rochelle: I do not need this, okay?! My man has two jobs!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Two jobs equals one finger.