Cliff: You know, this, uh, getting up in the middle of the night with a crying baby stuff, that's... That's the reason I never had kids.
Norm: That's the only reason, huh, Cliff?
Cliff: Well, and the fact that my mother taught me to have a healthy respect for the evils of overpopulation, Normie. Yeah, you know what? I can still remember her looking at me and saying, "For the love of God, Cliffy, let it stop with you."

Frasier: You know, it just isn't fair. I mean, I came to the... I wanted to be one of the guys. And all I'm doing is sitting on my duff watching other people do things.
Norm: Welcome to Normworld. Keep your hands inside the car at all times.

Frasier: Friends, congratulate me. I've just had my first 3 consecutive hours of sleep since I became a father.
Norm: Lilith's been making you get up with the baby at night when it cries, huh?
Frasier: Well, being a progressive couple, we actually take turns, but last night, as she was gently nudging me with one of her serrated elbows, I fell back on the old yoga trick of lowering my heart rate, holding my breath, and staring blankly as though I was dead.
Woody: And that worked?
Frasier: Nope. Didn't buy it for a minute. See, I'd forgotten it was she that taught me that trick during our honeymoon.