Frasier Quote #119

Quote from Frasier in Strange Bedfellows, Part 2

Diane: Sam thinks he's going to fire me. But I have a little surprise for him. I'm resigning.
Frasier: You're leaving Cheers?
Diane: That's right.
Frasier: Well, great. You can work for me. I need a new receptionist.
Diane: Frasier, you have a wonderful receptionist. Mrs. McGrady has worked for you and your family for 20 years.
Frasier: Well, yes, but I caught her in a typo the other day, so she's history.
Diane: Thank you, Frasier. I don't think so.
Frasier: Okay, but one word from you and that blue-haired head rolls.

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 ‘Strange Bedfellows, Part 2’ Quotes

Quote from Norm

Norm: [enters] Evening, everybody.
All: Norm!
Woody: What's going down, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: My cheeks on this barstool.

Quote from Frasier

Frasier: Welcome to the losers' club, baby. Now that you've paid your dues, here's your membership card. Yeah, we're a pair, aren't we? A couple of chumps that life just kicked in the teeth, and why am I talking like Broderick Crawford?
Diane: Frasier, I know you think I'm jealous of Janet and Sam's relationship, but I'm not. I just don't want to see him get hurt. That's really all there is to it.
Frasier: I think you're kidding yourself, Diane. We both know the reason you've been down in the dumps. But believe me, there's no need to be. Sam is not really happy with that woman. Just imagine the mental strain it must be trying to use the right fork all the time. Don't give up hope. I haven't.
Diane: You're a lovely man. I'm sorry I hurt you. I wish there was some way I could make you forgive me.
Frasier: Well, marry me. Bear my children. Let me die in your arms.
Diane: I was thinking more along the lines of making fudge.
Frasier: Well, I like your fudge.

Quote from Diane

Diane: The last time we had an official parting of the ways there was some question as to who left whom. That is why this time I've gone to the trouble of tendering my resignation in the written form. Legal precedent states that the written document always supersedes the spoken word, especially when it's spoken by a goof.
Sam: Oh, fine. Fine. Who cares? See you in the funny papers.
Diane: Oh, that's perfect. The funny papers. Don't say another word. Let that be the last utterance I remember. And now I'm off to begin a new life. I shall forget you in a trice.
Sam: Oh, a trice? Please, let that be the last word I hear from you.
Diane: You troglodyte.
Sam: That's even better!