TV Quotes

Sam: Well, I guess I've never... I've never looked into your eyes.
Diane: Something wrong with them?
Sam: No. I just don't think I've ever seen eyes that color before. Matter of fact, I don't think I've ever seen that color before. Yes, I have. Yes, I have.
Diane: Where?
Sam: I was, uh... I was on a ski weekend up at Stowe. I was coming in late one day, last person off the slope as the sun had just gone down. And the sky became this incredible color. I usually don't notice things like that, and I found myself kind of walking around in the cold, hoping that it wouldn't change, wishing that I had somebody there to share it with. Afterwards, I tried to convince myself that I'd imagined that color, that I hadn't really seen it, that nothing on this earth could be that beautiful. Now I see I was wrong. [Diane is silent] Wouldn't work, huh?
Diane: What?
Sam: An intelligent woman would see right through that.
Diane: Oh. Oh! In a minute.
Sam: Damn. [Diane downs a shot]

Leo: Last semester, my son comes home from college with his new fiance, who's black.
Coach: I've been thinking about that, and It's a tough one, but I think I've got it.
Leo: Well, but wait a minute cos there's more.
Coach: No, Leo. Hold it, Leo. Leo, it's a problem of communication. Here's what you do, when you get home, you sit the kids down and say to your boy- What's your boy's name?
Leo: Ron.
Coach: Uh, Ron. What's Ron's fiance's name?
Leo: Rick.
Coach: Rick. So, you say... You say, "Rick, Ron..." Rick and Ron?
Norm: Suck it up, Coachie. Hang tough in there.
Coach: Leo... Leo, if you're that unhappy about it, just throw him out and tell him you never want to see him again.
Leo: I can't do that. I love the kid.
Coach: Oh.
Leo: Oh, I see what you're saying.
Coach: You do? What?
Leo: If I can't accept the kid the way he is, I'll lose him.
Coach: Boy, that's good.
Leo: When you put it that way, what choice do I have? Thanks, Coach. You know, you're not Gus, but you're not bad.
Coach: Leo, even Gus isn't Gus any more.

Diane: Sam, now, it's true, hiring Norman has emotional overtones. But without emotions, the mind becomes a stagnant pond. And let's face it, in your case, we're not exactly dealing with white water rapids in the first place.

Diane: This is one of the most amateurish, hackneyed, odious pieces of effluvium ever to wash down the pike. Listen to this drivel. "l fly through a puckish arena, where echoes dance, where echoes dance, where echoes dance" This sounds familiar.
Norm: Well, you said it three times.
Diane: This poem is plagiarized.
Sam: Oh, now I stole it? And a minute ago, you said it stunk.
Diane: It does stink. Leave it to you to not have the sense to steal something worthwhile.
Sam: Aw, you know, I realize that it's tough to have somebody come along and swipe your dreams of glory, so I will not take offense at that remark.
Diane: That poem is fraudulent, and I intend to find its true source, even if I have to search through every greeting card to do so. [Sam laughs] Believe me, Sam Malone, I will not rest until today, the blackest day in the history of literature, is blotted out for all eternity.