‘Grandma was a Rolling Stone’
Season 1, Episode 7 - Aired November 12, 1993
Cory's grandmother rolls into to town and promises to take him to get his new baseball card signed, but Cory is disappointed when she doesn't show up. Meanwhile, Mr. Feeny's niece is in town and Eric tries to impress her, and Alan takes Shawn on a fishing trip.
Quote from Mr. Feeny
Bernice Matthews: Who is this guy?
Cory: My teacher.
Bernice Matthews: Does he give you straight As?
Cory: No.
Bernice Matthews: And why not?
Mr. Feeny: Have you talked to the boy?
Quote from Alan
Alan: Your brother's discovered girls, he can't sit still. When you're Eric's age and you can't sit still, I'll take Morgan. It's the endless cycle of fishing.
Cory: And what about after Morgan?
Alan: Well, then I'll just be some guy in a fishing hat with a lot of boring stories.
Quote from Eric
Eric: Told her we could maybe take a drive when I get my license. She laughed, but it was a flirty laugh.
Quote from Eric
Eric: It's Feeny's niece. She's unbelievable. I've got to think. I've got to think. I've got to take her to a world she's never been to before. Dinner. Movie. Movie. Dinner. This has to be perfectly orchestrated or -- Weasel!
Quote from Alan
Mr. Feeny: Alan, I would appreciate you keep your son and his hormones inside the house, at least until my niece leaves.
Alan: Why George, what are you talking about? Eric's been up in his room for -
Eric: twenty -
Alan: minutes.
Quote from Eric
Eric: Yes, you see dinner and a movie is the premiere form of dating entertainment. Dinner, movie. Movie, dinner. Dinner, dinner. Movie, movie.
Quote from Mr. Feeny
Mr. Feeny: A wonderfully rich tapestry of human experience.
Eric: Don't mock what I am, Mr.Feeny.
Quote from Morgan
Eric: Okay, Weasel, do you remember what we've been practising?
Morgan: This is my brother, Eric. He's very shy.
Quote from Mr. Feeny
Bernice Matthews: Okay, teacher, you better kiss the rest of those mums goodbye.
Mr. Feeny: Who is that woman?
Cory: My grandma. Don't you just love her?
Mr. Feeny: No, I don't.
Quote from Mr. Feeny
Mr. Feeny: Excuse me, I will not be jerked around.
Bernice Matthews: Oh. Well, excuse me, but as the matriarch of this family, not to mention a card-carrying member of the Kiwanis club, I can personally vouch for the fact that this fine young man has been up in his room for the past twenty minutes.
Mr. Feeny: And excuse me, Ms. Kiwanis, but how could you know that? When I just saw you pull in your Winnebago and run over my mums not forty seconds ago.