Michael Quote #481

Quote from Michael in Taste Makers

Michael: Well, George Michael, you've always been such a funny little guy, you know. Of course it make sense now, you being a computer genius. Speaking of which, question: I'm trying to gather as much capital as possible to help out Dad, but I think that they're hiding something. I mean, they've got secret bookkeeping, and, um, came across this file here called "Gated Community." Each time I try to print it, I get this root warning, you know-
George Michael: Well, the warning doesn't look like it came from a normal printer, actually.
Michael: It's not, no, I sent it to the Smile Maker. It's a dental printer.
George Michael: Okay. That explains that toothbrush next to the warning sign. And you see how they spelled "byte" without a y. No, this is for dentists.
Michael: Listen to you. This is why you have a billion-dollar software company and your old man has to hit "popcorn" on the microwave any time I want to heat something up.
George Michael: You hit "heat," then hit "time," then...
Michael: Mine does not work that way. But popcorn sounds good. Let's go make some of that. Come on.

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 ‘Taste Makers’ Quotes

Quote from Maeby

Maeby: Well, that explains why Maeby's credit cards aren't working.
George Michael: Maeby's credit cards?
Maeby: Oh, sorry. The minute I put the teeth in, I become a completely different person. [chuckles] Speaking of which, there's your solution. We both have alter egos, and I think it's about time we killed them off. What do you say? George Maharis can have a heart attack. Maeby gets hit by a bus.
George Michael: You're killing off Maeby?
Maeby: Yup, see you.
George Michael: I know Annette can be forgetful, but she remembers Maeby is the dominant personality, right?
Maeby: Hey, I got a pretty sweet setup here. Okay? I finally got rid of my beloved Stan. He's in the hospital, massive head injury. Free rent. New neighbors every six to eight months. Also, Maeby doesn't even have a high school diploma. Not a good move, given the world my generation is leaving hers.
George Michael: I'm glad it's easy for you, but me and George Maharis have the same teeth. [Maeby chuckles] People are gonna figure it out. If I'm not arrested for fraud, I'll be in debt for life. I'm gonna end up in my old bedroom.
Maeby: Yeah. It's six o'clock. I'm already an hour and a half late for dinner. And I'm sorry if I'm repeating myself, but, uh... Annette, she like-a the pasta, hmm? [sings] How did you ever find me?

Quote from Tobias

Tobias: All right, look, we're in a bad situation here. But, I've been jammed with bigger things in tighter spots than this.

Quote from Maeby

George Michael: I was this close to telling Rebel the whole truth: that you fired everyone months ago, and the thing is a fraud. Then we open the doors, and the place is abuzz. She totally bought it. She wants to invest now.
I don't know how you did it, but it was great. You got people there for the day.
Maeby: I didn't hire anybody for the day.
George Michael: Then where did those people come from? The place was wall-to-wall nerds.
Maeby: Yeah, this is making sense. Those people that you saw didn't come in for the day. They never left. Remember when I said I fired everybody? What I did was, I asked Joan in HR to fire everybody for me. And then, so I didn't have to make two phone calls, I fired her there on the spot.
George Michael: So you fired the person in charge of...
Maeby: Firing. Yes. So, you know, you fire the person in HR last. That's the lesson here. But, hey, this is how you learn in business, am I right?
George Michael: You mean we're still somehow paying these people?
Maeby: Well, we're not paying Joan in HR. Gotta give me credit for that one.