Ava Quote #264
Quote from Ava in Valentine's Day
Ava: [on the phone] Aww. Happy Valentine's Day to you, too, Iggy. Yeah, you might see me tonight. [a male parent walks into Ava's office] I already have car insurance! [Ava hides a picture of her with her boyfriend] Hey, Tristan.
[aside to camera:]
Ava: Tristan's a hot dad in the 91st percentile of hot dads. He's got a kid in Jacob's class, and he's handsome. He looks like men do before they have kids.
[back:]
Tristan: I'm here to complain.
Ava: Oh. [Ava turns the picture of her and her boyfriend around so Tristan can see] Please continue.
Abbott Elementary Quotes
‘Valentine's Day’ Quotes
Quote from Ava
Ava: Internet sucks today, right? [laughs] Not one scandal? Do better, Twitter. [marker squeaking] You teenagers today are so boring paying all that attention.
Quote from Jacob
Jacob: Unlike Phase One Tony Stark, Malcolm X and Martin Luther King were both anti-capitalists. [Jacob nearly falls off his desk]
Student: You seem a little shaky, Mr. Hill. Are you good?
Jacob: Oh, yeah. I'm good. I am... totally fine.
[aside to camera:]
Jacob: Ava has been in my last three classes, okay? Either this is some time-intensive prank, or I am getting fired... for teaching Black history. [scoffs] I flew too close to the sun. Like an anti-racist Icarus.
Quote from Ava
Barbara: I mean, he absolutely likes you. Although I think that workplace romances are a terrible idea.
Ava: Yeah. That's why I never tried anything with him. Also, I have a boyfriend. But mostly Barb's reason.
Janine: So, wait. Everyone just... Just knows this?
Ava: Yeah, y'all the only two dummies that don't know that you like each other.
Janine: Whoa!
Barbara: But you do like him, right?
Ava: Despite you lack of swag, height, and good outfits, he thinks you're cute, but just don't do anything nasty on school grounds, because if I can't, then y'all can't.