Melissa Quote #79
Quote from Melissa in Wrong Delivery
Melissa: Yeah, you heard the baby shark. Keep it movin', and quit staring us down with that lazy eye.
Kristin Marie: Who you think you're talkin' to?
Melissa: A woman with Jersey mall hair and too much makeup. Now take that sfigato ass down the street.
Janine: Oh. Melissa! I don't even know what "sfigato" means and I know that was too much.
Jacob: It's a very small cup of coffee.
Melissa: That's not even close, and I can say whatever I want to my stupid sister.
Janine: Sister? As in the woman that works at the other school? You have the same mom? Y-Your sister?
Melissa: Yeah, yeah, good, you know what having a sister means. Glad you're making good use of that Penn education.
Janine: Wait.
Melissa: And, no, I'm not saying another word about this.
Abbott Elementary Quotes
‘Wrong Delivery’ Quotes
Quote from Barbara
Mr. Johnson: Don't take it so hard. Everybody gets dumped. If it can happen to Michael B. Jordan, it can happen to you.
Barbara: Now, that white boy sure can act. Ooh! I love those Back to the Future movies.
Together: Michael J. Fox.
Barbara: Hmm?
Quote from Mr. Johnson
Mr. Johnson: It's risky, but it could work. And you probably won't get your tires slashed. You ever heard of Martha and the Vandellas? Well, I dumped Martha, but I'm pretty sure the Vandellas vandalized my car.
Gregory: I would like to not have my tires slashed, so...
Quote from Barbara
Barbara: Well, if they do go with a Black actor, I hope they go with that Mr. Brian Austin Green. I'm so proud of that young man and all of his success.
Gregory: Uh...
Janine: Tuh-tuh-tuh!
[aside to camera:]
Janine: So, there are a bunch of white celebrities who Barbara thinks are Black. Like, Brian Austin Green would be Brian Tyree Henry.
[flashback to Barbara greeting her class:]
Barbara: Ooh, I see you, little Carrie Underwood. Good morning.
[aside to camera:]
Jacob: Kerry Washington.
[flashback to Barbara and Melissa leaving the school:]
Barbara: I'm going straight home, put on a little Millie Bobby Brown.
[aside to camera:]
Melissa: Bobby Brown.
[flashback to Barbara walking in the hallway with Ava:]
Barbara: No one's done more for Black actors than Tommy Lee Jones.
[aside to camera:]
Ava: James Earl Jones.
[aside to camera:]
Janine: And we just let her keep thinking that. It's easier.